Yes you do fit in. You may not feel like it. After you've been hurt, I think it's normal , at least I hope so, to hide a while. I went into hibernation when my marriage ended and haven't felt good about myself since. I again went into hibernation when my dad passed away. My self esteem hit rock bottom again. Blessings Sweetie. Hugs.

Anna, you work in a toxic environment, your family is not attentive to your needs, and you lack substantive friendships (not the online kind) that you can unload your problems and ask for support and advice. Some people are cold, harsh and cruel, and if they can oppress a weaker individual, they will not hesitate to do so. Just reassess your relationships to see if they are worth maintaining, and let go of the ones you feel that are too toxic.

It seems that you are bringing other people's problems home and making yourself ill from them. It's not worth it. Sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself , and other times you would need to retreat because some people are not worth burning your brain cells over. Life is full of injustice, and working in the legal field and in the health industries, I have seen bucketfuls of unfair things. We observe and fight when our rights are infringed, or let go when the cause is not worth the effort. Hoping that you are well, and that your housing issue proceeds smoothly. Take care :)

I've been in jail recently for a short sentence. I'd take issue that they are all the scum of the earth, many are broken people trying to find healing and hope. As you are. I hear your pain - I'm broken too and whilst I know my crime others do too and won't let me even begin to move on. I'm a misfit, a complex broken person, but I suspect most are, actually. I'm in UK and I've found emailing the Samaritans helpful.

Sorry you are going through this. Is there a possibility you are depressed enough that it’s affecting how you see things?
Im an older lady too and I’m in a similar situation, it seems nothing I do can change things. It’s been life long starting with being born into an abusive family and now have children the same. It’s my role in the family to be the punching bag and they will never change.
I decided that if I can’t change my situation I could learn to accept it and try not to need or expect anything from other people. I think the only thing that can explain my inability to change myself or my situation to improve things is past life karma. Yes I’m lonely but it beats being abused. I’ve found a bit of comfort and enlightenment from Buddhist and stoic teachings.
I hope you can find an answer to your situation, you deserve better.

Thank you for your replies. I'm sorry I said people in jail were the scum of the earth. when I was writing that it felt wrong but i just left it in. that are good and bad people in all walks of life, including jail i expect. I just feel really bad about myself. really really not able to fit in.