Hi Mal,

It's not easy, that's for sure. What I try to do is remember the last time I felt positive and try to do the things I did then to stimulate those feelings. It can be very frustrating when your go-to's aren't working quite as well and your dark moment lasts longer than expected.

I might be able to explain myself a bit better if I tell you about a recent dark moment for me and how I got my "mojo" back, as I call it. Lol.

Two Wednesdays ago, my grandmother and I had a fight. Typically, we apologize and move on and while we did apologize, I did not move on. It depressed and upset me for the remainder of the week. I tried watching my favorite show, reading, going on DS, treating myself to something I like, exercising, talking to my mom, but while they worked temporarily, I was still waking up everyday irritable.

I was just starting to feel better last Monday/Tuesday and what should happen again on Wednesday? Another fight. Considering I wasn't fully recovered from the fight the week before, it hit me hard and I fell back into my "funk." It took me going out to dinner with my best friend and hearing that she had been feeling the same way all week for me to feel better. While I don't like knowing my best friend was experiencing the same dark feelings, it was a comfort to know I wasn't alone. By the following morning I was full swing back in sync.

Another turning point was accepting my mood. I find the most frustrated I get about being in a funk, the deeper I go into the funk. I had to accept and understand that while I do have control over my actions, at times my feelings have a mind of their own and need time to feel the way they feel. Me pressuring myself to feel better on my terms isn't always going to work.

I hope this helped and I hope you begin to feel better soon!

~Mel

I feel very fortunate to have a wonderful psychiatrist. I see her regularly but if I feel myself slipping into that dark place, I call her immediately, and we usually can work it out through talk therapy where my anxiety is coming from.

So, when I'm in my darkest place, I call my psychiatrist. I'm sorry I'm not more helpful.

PS
I have learned that when I'm in my darkest place I should NOT be on the computer. For some reason, for me, it makes it worse.

HUGS

Thanks for the replies. All I have currently are 'cyber' support systems - which is pretty sad; it almost seems surreal. I'm so much of a burden on my spouse that I've pushed her into (so far) emotional internet relationships! I get immensely depressed when I think about how things have digressed to this point!
I just wanted to see how others cope/overcome their challenges...