I know the feels. Find your joy in the small things, a pretty flower, tasty food, that cute guy who smiled at you. Consider making yourself smaller goals. Instead of looking at the far future, make a point of celebrating each step that brings you closer. Some times you just have to be happy that you woke up today because that means you could accomplish something tomorrow =)

Replied on another site here. And so, the only way is up. Hugs.

I have been trying it seems so hard at time like a back and forth thing

It can be very back and forth, yeah. Depression is a struggle, you know you want to be happy but your brain is telling you otherwise. It can make even the good things seem pointless. You could win the lottery and just think "oh great, now I'm just going to blow it all". Very few people accomplish what they set out to do in their life, but everyone accomplishes something and we have to help ourselves to see the goodness in that.

i'm sorry you are having this experience. I understand. been there too. still am actually. it's just a day to day struggle. it's much harder for some people than others and it's not fair. I come here when I feel really awful. I journal here too. do you do that? that helps me sometimes just to write. you're not alone. and I agree with dementeddoll about finding little things that make you feel kind of happy... yea, and just narrowing down the picture of your life to one little thing at a time so it doesn't seem so overwhelming and depressing. hugs.

Thank you for commenting. And your advice. I hate how one minute I can be good then it switch's so fast to sad and crying. I have lost so much so fast and I have never really broke down till now.

Hallo there.... hugs... depression is like a black dog that follows you around, refuse to go away when you asked it to. Well, just to clarify, I have nothing against black dogs. I think they are wonderful. But I think most people with depression know what it mean. It’s this heavy burden you carry around all day Long and nothing can lift that spirit up. But I agreed with most members here. Little things like a nice meal, a cup of nice drink, journaling helps to just distract you from the ‘burden’ for a while and that’s enough for people who are going through depression. I just need a moment that their mind don’t spiral downward into the abyss. Hope this helps. We are here for you and journey with you. Praying for you. God bless!

Thank you all I'm glad to have a group that understand how I'm feeling.. woke up today with out a panack attack so happy about that. And I totally understand that derden thing I feel like I'm falling half the time. Than you all