Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
...I'm having a really hard time calling my Doctor. I know it's the "right" thing to do. I know that I'm not in the position to make wise choices for myself right now, but it's just sooooo hard. I just feel so hopeless. What are we really going to do that we haven't done?
I remember telling my Dad to go to the Doctor because I wasn't ready to lose him. He told me he would if it came to that (I knew he wouldn't) He also told me He could do more for me on the other side. (I was going through a custody battle at the time) He also said he had done every thing that he ever wanted to do. I rolled my eyes, and said okay, what ever. I knew he was sick, but I thought we had a lot more time than we had. Two weeks later he was gone. At fist the shock and the trauma of losing him was like, well, any time you lose someone. It's bad. but after a while I started thinking about how it was his choice. He was tired, and ready to go. And I made peace with that. Yeah, I still miss him. But I would never have wanted him to stay just to make me happy. I would hope that my kids would feel the same way. The only bad think is we don't talk about such things. . .
Damnit. I feel like that Monster living in the cave again.
I remember telling my Dad to go to the Doctor because I wasn't ready to lose him. He told me he would if it came to that (I knew he wouldn't) He also told me He could do more for me on the other side. (I was going through a custody battle at the time) He also said he had done every thing that he ever wanted to do. I rolled my eyes, and said okay, what ever. I knew he was sick, but I thought we had a lot more time than we had. Two weeks later he was gone. At fist the shock and the trauma of losing him was like, well, any time you lose someone. It's bad. but after a while I started thinking about how it was his choice. He was tired, and ready to go. And I made peace with that. Yeah, I still miss him. But I would never have wanted him to stay just to make me happy. I would hope that my kids would feel the same way. The only bad think is we don't talk about such things. . .
Damnit. I feel like that Monster living in the cave again.
Then, what can I say? Call him/her.
I know that calling anyone is hard, and calling your Dr is especially hard. But you know that you need to call them and you have acknowledged that you need some extra support now.
What is the worst that can happen? You feel like a monster in a cave right now, could you feel much worse? So you pick up the phone and talk to another human being for a few minutes, it might even help!
Go for it, we believe in you and know that you can do this
Here if you need to talk about anything
*monkey hugs*
let me start by saying please dont put much stake in what i am saying, as i just came here today because i am not doing well. that being said, i will share my thoughts on things. i understand how you feel hopeless and think nothing new is going to be done. there is some truth to that. i mean, have there been major scientific breakthroughs in our understanding of the brain, its biochemistry, psychiatry in the past five or ten years? not to my knowledge. i am a wildlife biologist so i dont follow journals relating to depression or other mental conditions, but i can see how a person would feel how you do. but, like so many others have said, dont focus on what you have to gain, but what do you have to lose? maybe you feel like you are the bottom, but even there you are making others feel better. people like me who are able to see that what i am going through isnt exclusive to me. others are in the same boat. so, call the doctor or dont, but keep coming here and helping others just by sharing. and maybe you will get the strength to make that call soon. from there maybe you will feel better and be able to offer more to people like me who have some bad wiring upstairs by being able to share a success story.
to the community in general, this is my first day here and i dont know if i have said something inappropriate. if so, i am sorry. please let me know and i will delete/remove this post. i came here for truth and help, not hollow "hang in theres" and sugar coatings. i suspect kokoah wants the truth too.
oh, and kokoah. nice name... like cocoa and everyone loves chocolate
"i dont know if i have said something inappropriate. if so, i am sorry. please let me know and i will delete/remove this post. i came here for truth and help, not hollow "hang in theres" and sugar coatings. i suspect kokoah wants the truth too."
You have made your contribution to the thread. You have said/done nothing inappropriate. I am replying mainly because you are new.
What you have posted is your opinion .. and it is welcome. I sincerely mean that. As such, it is subject to other's opinion ... so don't be insulted if someone has a different view.
Watch for another thread .. DS NEWCOMERS .. which is designed just for you. I think it will help you get into the flow here.
My opinion is that "breakthroughs" have occurred tremendously in the last 10 years. With gnome knowledge, advances in pharmaceuticals, etc .. tremendous advances. If someone is suffering from a health condition . .. mental or otherwise, .. seeking medical care is highly recommended and the likelihood of effective treatment is much higher than within the last 10 years.
(You cannot DIRECTLY delete a post on DS). Check out that newcomers thread.
As far as your dad, I know how he felt, only because my ex husband
TRIGGER..................................... committed suicide last March and I know it was because he was in a lot of pain, possibly had a brain tumor, and didn't want to put his family through the pain that he was having to deal with. We were friends for 42 years and I miss him terribly but he did it for his family, because they were everything to him. I really enjoyed reading the end of your post because there was so much maturity in your words. And that isn't a monster you are living with, you are living with the devil who is very hard to get rid of, but it can be done. I'm just glad that you have all this support on DS and even more once you make that phone call.
I just realized that my meds are on the last refill. So I will HAVE to make an apt with my Doctor. I have mixed feelings. But I will do the "right" thing. Maybe this time will be different. ???
Welcome Speedbump. Thank you for being one of the people who have made me feel like what I say matters. I hope you find the support I have here.
Gramy, I'm so sorry for your loss. Your Husband sounds like an awesome man. There are worse things than death, and I think he probably knew that. Like with my Dad, I hope you can have some peace, and be happy for him.
I wish that I could tell you all that my mind is in a much better place, and I guess it is as far as I'm feeling a little more emotion than I was. Even crying is better than feeling nothing. But I'm still feeling like that little Monster. Do you think therapy would help Smeegle from LOTR? That's kinda how I feel. For those of you who have never seen Lord of the rings, just forget about that part.
I'm still so tired, tired in every way. I'm still having a hard time doing the simplest of things.