Wow, insecure, it's my birthday too. I must say I am not feeling too depressed, I took myself out to a late lunch and had two glasses of wine which is making me feel a bit up. I don't drink often so it kind of went to my head already. That was about a half hour ago now that I came back home.

Sorry you are missing your husband. I've spent many birthdays alone and know the feeling. Try to do something extra nice for yourself today like I did for myself. And Happy Birthday.

dammit woman! treat yourself for the day!! :)
Take a relaxing bath.. go buy yourself a little indulgence.. go out for a few drinks or coffee with a close friend.. whatever floats your boat. Today you need to celebrate the fact that you are alive - even if you don't feel like its much to be celebrating right now.

My Gran died less than a week after my birthday and Dad's birthday will be soon. Dad's in his mid-seventies now so it'll be difficult for him. SBoom has a point - your husband wouldn't want to see you like this on your birthday, he'd want to see you taking care of yourself. Have another 'birthday' tomorrow and try to spoil yourself. That's what I do.

Happy Birthday to both of you. I think that fairiedust has the right idea: do something for yourself that you normally wouldn't do to cheer yourself up. Sometimes people enjoy little frivolous things like a massage, spa treatment, manicure, or a really nice dinner with a friend in a fancy restaurant.

Grief affects people in different ways. You might feel some comfort in reflecting back on all of the good memories you have made with your husband. Look at old pictures. Think about how lucky you were to have met him and had him in your life.

Oh, I'm sending you a big squishy birthday hug and wishing you to feel better as your day passes... Please know that we care about you and wish you the best ... AND spoil yourself!! I am SO sure your husband would want it that way...

Part of what can make birthdays so sad,to me, is when I'm feeling depressed and alone--the birthday seems to only emphathize my lack of joy,and how sorry I am to have lived one more year on earth.And I would imagine that missing your husband so much would only emphathize your feelings of depression and aloneness, on a day when peole are "supposed" to be joyous and celebrating.Missing your husband terribly,feeling deprived and grieving---it's so hard.A birthday is bound to bring an avalanche of memories of your time with him to you,as well.
There is,however, no law that says you have to feel happy on your birthday.Maybe it is a day,however,that you could more easily get through by calling family or friends,just to talk,explaining you do not feel like any celebration.If you can think of anything that might distract you from your sadness--might bring you some comfort--by all means, try and do that.I believe very strongly that your husband would want you to be happy,or to try to be happy, in general as well as on this difficult day.Something I did a year after I lost my close friend,on my birthday,was write him a long letter--telling him how much I wished he could be with me now.How much I miss him.It helped to make me feel closer to him,and it also reminded me of what I knew he would say:that he would want me to to learn to be happy again,even without him physically around any more,save in thoughts and multiple cherished memories..But that's just me--perhaps I should not have dwelled so much on the past,on that day.However, it's YOUR day--to do with what you can do,what can give you the most solace,diversion, and encouragment at this point in your life.It's still about the long process of healing.
I am very sorry for your loss.I believe that you can find(or have) a way to keep your husband a close part of your life,more a presence than an absence to you,some day.I believe,too,that he is watching over you and hoping very much to see you heal--to see you one day feeling happy again.
That said--Have the very best birthday you can have.Hold on to what you have,to what you need. Best wishes that next year will be far better.

I met my daughter and a friend for dinner, Thank you all for your replies.