Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Well, hubby just informed me yesterday that we are going cross country to visit the inlaws. Don't get me wrong, I would love to see the inlaws, but I couldn't be more stressed out and angry then I am right now.
A. I already took of a week for vacation just to be informed that we are leaving two or three days BEFORE I am off for vacation. Hubby said he'll take care of it, but bad planning.
B. We are driving out to deliver a truck to my nephew. Our trucks transmission went up, so we got the transmission fixed and plan on driving the truck 1200 or so miles to get it to him. We haven't even so much as driven the truck since it was fixed, and I realllly don't see how driving out there without the possibility of it breaking down is not being taken into account.
C. Our cat is very sick and is on insulin and two oral lliquid medications. His diet also needs to be very closely monitored along with his insulin intake to make sure he doesn't go into diabetic shock. To me, it is obvious that Oscar can only be taken care of by someone who knows what they are doing, but my husband has made it clear that he has no desire to hire a professional, and would instead like to get a friend or neighbor to take care of him. This is a cat that has gone into diabetic shock numerous times and I have no desire to put this sort of stress on a friend who knows NOTHING of feline diabetes. Oscar might be a gentle giant, but he is a giant nonetheless. He doesn't exactly enjoy having liquid shot into his mouth and he does have the tendency to fight back a bit, oftentimes by batting at your hand with a paw and imbedding a claw in one's skin. Very painful and not something I would expect a friend to appreciate. Besides, last time we got a friend to take care of Oscar, she didn't even learn how to properly administer his insulin and even admitted to me that he didn't get his shot on a few occasions.
D. Maybe a bit TMI, but we are going to be going to a beach in what I believe to be a campside-type location. I am just getting my period and tave suffered with endometriosis. Apart from losing a ridiculous ammount of blood and likely having to go use a bathroom that may not be availiable every hour or so, but I suffer from VERY severe, sometimes almost unbearable pain. I don't see how I am going to be able to go in the water let alone enjoy myself as I will likely be embarassing the hell out of myself by constantly needing to run to a bathroom (if there are latrines I am going to shoot myself).
I truly do want to see my family, but this is way too spontaneous, last minute and ill-planned. Hubby appears shocked and thinks that I am way too stressed out and that I should be happy to see family. I really don't think he has a clue as to why this is so ridiculously stressful even after I explained it to him.
If hubby does not at least get a professional to take care of Oscar, I doubt I am going to go. I know he is going to take it badly as me not caring enough to see family, but we have spent loads of money on trying to take care of Oscar, and I have no desire to see it go down the toilet because we can't find someone who really knows how to care for a sick cat. I am very afraid of coming back home to a dead cat while screwing up the entire vacation and having a miserable time by having to run to a bathroom every second. Also, if the truck were to break down mid trip, I would be stressed out of my mind.
All I want to do, and all my body is telling me to do is RELAX! This is not relaxation. It is stress overload.
A. I already took of a week for vacation just to be informed that we are leaving two or three days BEFORE I am off for vacation. Hubby said he'll take care of it, but bad planning.
B. We are driving out to deliver a truck to my nephew. Our trucks transmission went up, so we got the transmission fixed and plan on driving the truck 1200 or so miles to get it to him. We haven't even so much as driven the truck since it was fixed, and I realllly don't see how driving out there without the possibility of it breaking down is not being taken into account.
C. Our cat is very sick and is on insulin and two oral lliquid medications. His diet also needs to be very closely monitored along with his insulin intake to make sure he doesn't go into diabetic shock. To me, it is obvious that Oscar can only be taken care of by someone who knows what they are doing, but my husband has made it clear that he has no desire to hire a professional, and would instead like to get a friend or neighbor to take care of him. This is a cat that has gone into diabetic shock numerous times and I have no desire to put this sort of stress on a friend who knows NOTHING of feline diabetes. Oscar might be a gentle giant, but he is a giant nonetheless. He doesn't exactly enjoy having liquid shot into his mouth and he does have the tendency to fight back a bit, oftentimes by batting at your hand with a paw and imbedding a claw in one's skin. Very painful and not something I would expect a friend to appreciate. Besides, last time we got a friend to take care of Oscar, she didn't even learn how to properly administer his insulin and even admitted to me that he didn't get his shot on a few occasions.
D. Maybe a bit TMI, but we are going to be going to a beach in what I believe to be a campside-type location. I am just getting my period and tave suffered with endometriosis. Apart from losing a ridiculous ammount of blood and likely having to go use a bathroom that may not be availiable every hour or so, but I suffer from VERY severe, sometimes almost unbearable pain. I don't see how I am going to be able to go in the water let alone enjoy myself as I will likely be embarassing the hell out of myself by constantly needing to run to a bathroom (if there are latrines I am going to shoot myself).
I truly do want to see my family, but this is way too spontaneous, last minute and ill-planned. Hubby appears shocked and thinks that I am way too stressed out and that I should be happy to see family. I really don't think he has a clue as to why this is so ridiculously stressful even after I explained it to him.
If hubby does not at least get a professional to take care of Oscar, I doubt I am going to go. I know he is going to take it badly as me not caring enough to see family, but we have spent loads of money on trying to take care of Oscar, and I have no desire to see it go down the toilet because we can't find someone who really knows how to care for a sick cat. I am very afraid of coming back home to a dead cat while screwing up the entire vacation and having a miserable time by having to run to a bathroom every second. Also, if the truck were to break down mid trip, I would be stressed out of my mind.
All I want to do, and all my body is telling me to do is RELAX! This is not relaxation. It is stress overload.
Girl, wish I had some cure all suggestions.
What I hear more than anything is "I feel so out of control of this situation, and it makes me feel like I am going to implode. My schedule and plans have been shot, and I don't like sudden changes and feeling out of control. It stresses me out and makes me anxious. I'm on the verge of a panic attack"
Is that close, at all? That's how I would feel.
Deeeeeep breath. Now, other than kill our hubby, which is completely out of the question, let's break down what you can change and what you have to accept.
The trip is going to happen. It's going to be at a shore. You can't change your cycle. some of that is just going to suck. Say, "I can't change these things. I have to accept them and take five minutes to sit alone, quietly, and do that.
Now, let's see what you can. Can you take the cat with you? In a carrier. Okay, that causes him a bit of stress, but if you have NO ONE you know and trust to leave him with, he'll be better off with you. Get a cat harness so you can let him out some on a lead, and use him as an excuse not to go swimming and having to stay close to water, bathrooms, etc. He will have his mommy, and she will have a diversion to keep from killing daddy *grin*
Pack a special bag with all the things you may need for your pain, including water bottle, Pamprin, chocolate, jack daniel's ;) and you won't stress over being stuck somewhere and not having what you need. The cat can provide the reason why you have to stay in the camper/tent/cabin, lying down a bit, so he will stay calm. gooood kitty
I do think you should go. You'll beat yourself up worse over the guilt if you don't than if you do, but you need to be able to "control" some portion, no matter small, that will bring your anxiety down. If not mine, maybe they will lead you to come up with some of your own :)
I suggest "you should go" because you need a vacation, and a break, and it's a shame for you to have to miss that visit with family.
If you are more comfortable staying home, and it won't make you resentful, more angry, hurt, and guilty, then by all means, that' s your decision as well, and certainly not a wrong one :)
On that issue, whether to go or not to go, do what will make you happiest. and hey, that's another decision you can control :)
BTW- PERFECT description of how I felt Wuwei. I couldn't even concentrate on anything and was practically hyperventilating I was so worried.
It's perfectly understandable about how you would worry about your furry family member. I hope he does well. All the best to you.
I'm sure the friend will be fine, and as long as she understands that if ANYTHING can't be done or if there is a problem, the vet is the next step, you will be a little less worried about him. Get her to promise you, so you are assured if anything happens, he will be at the vet, so you can enjoy the time at the beach house :) I know having that had to be a huge relief.
I hope you have a WONDERFUL time. You deserve a break. Time for your art and some computer time. Please keep us updated. I'm excited for you. and give yourself a pat on the back. You are, despite the anxiety and worry, coping and handling, and don't forget that! You didn't sink and withdraw.. You are hanging in there. Forget sugar and spice.... GUTS AND STRENGTH! That's what little girls are made of :)
Well, my friend did end up showing that she is capable, so huge relief there. So, I got all my fears off my back to the point where I was actually looking forward to the vacation a bit just to be told...
...we might not go.
I don't know why it triggers panic attacks, but whenever anything in my schedule changes or I am uncertain of something BAM!
Apparently there is some sort of bullshit going on at hubby's job which makes him think it would be bad for him to take time off. He also is hugely stressed himself as some jerk is causing problems at his job. This is making me worried that his job may be unstable, but being as he is a manager I doubt nothing will happe to him.
I myself need to head for work soon and I am feeling physically ill. I don't know if it is stress related or if I have a stomach bug, but my own anxiety level is through the roof. I REALLY hope this does not end up being a delay for me quitting my job, but I can't put all the stress on hubby if shit is chaotic at his job as well.
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!