honey it sounds like you have more than depression going on. im not a dr so i cant make a diagnosis but i do wish you could go see one. all i can say is all the symptoms you mentioned are something right? something thats obviously interfering w your daily life.i know you said you cant see a dr but i strongly suggest you reconsider. have you ever had any type of therapy in the past due to the suicide attempts? attempting suicide is a cry for help. you just reached out so im reaching back. we hear your cries and im so here for ya if you ever want to talk but you need to let someone hear your cries in your real world too. anyone, a teacher, a friend, anyone. once you let down your guard and let a little love and insight in then youll be on the road to recovery. take care of yourself.

i think you know deep down that you are depressed but you don't want to admit it to yourself? your asking for people's opinion on what symptoms you have written down and some of them clearly show you have some degree of depression, and i think you know that. do you think people are weak minded or something along those lines to suffer from a mental health problem? thats not true many people suffer from mental health problems at some point in their life, it doesnt mean they're weak or pathetic. and it doesnt mean your weak for having depression, its an illness. i'm sure you havnt chose to have it! i'm just taking a guess here... its just my opinion that i think your finding it hard to accept your depressed and don't want to admit it for some reason? i suppose its only you that knows the real reason.

what scares you about being diagnosed and getting the help you need? I'm not a doctor either, but you know there is something not right, make an appointment and get a good assessment, don't play around with your life, "this is not a dress rehersal"...

People thanks for your replies...first of all i cant go to a doctor because i'm only 15 and need a parent or gaurdian with me and i cant get my mum 2 take me and i dont want her to know anyways but thats because of our relationship and things that have happened...To Aimee413 i did go to a councellor once but i hated it and refuse to ever see one again...they dont help and for me all they do is make things worse...To Kayleigh5 i dont think depression is a weakness i have quite afew frees with depression and their anything but weak...I actually think people with depression are extremely strong copin each day with that illness it amazing...Well i hope this helps you and other people alittle bit more.

I'm truly sorry that you feel this way at such a young age. Being fifteen is a very difficult time. Teenagers are truly dealing with alot of things in this day and age. When I was fifteen I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. What friends I did have were dealing with the same feelings. I continued to feel this way throughtout my teen years and into my early adulthood. Sometimes these feelings can control your everyday life and your friends and family try to make their own diagnosis. My mother attributed my poor self esteem and mood swings with the food I was eating. You know, hamburgers, french fries, etc. So, she started making me eat healthier foods. It was kind of comical really. But, I cannot say that I have grown out of it either. So, try to understand that it could be your body going through a transition. But, it is always safer to check out a doctor and see what he/she comes up with. If your mother will not take you, you can find your local free clinic. Most people believe that free clinics are just for women who are pregnant or with low income. But, that is not correct. Most free clinics will see anyone for free. They are completely confidential and or course, free. They will and do handle psychological issues daily. The brain is a very complicated device. You could simply have a chemical imbalance.Medication would easily take care of that. Remember, none of these feelings are bad and none of this is your fault. You hold the key to get better, not your mother or your friends.Remember that you have friends on this site who will always be there for you. But, please, I beg you, do get help. Do not wait until it gets so bad that you try to take your own life again. YOU ARE WORTH LIVING FOR!!! Do not forget that!

Love you for who you are,
Stacy

hey, you have a lot of the same symptoms that i did and i was diagnosed with clinical depression. i do think there could be more to it tho then just the depression. i really hope you get a chance to see a doctor. take care of yourself

Hi, well your username just on its own suggests a lot of issues going on in your life and with your family. Let me tell you that depending on what state you live in (assuming you are in the USA), you may be old enough to see someone without any parental notification being an issue - I know in my state, PA, at the age of 14 you are old enough to consent to therapy on your own and not have your parents involved.
(oops, now I see you are in UK, maybe someone else knows about the laws there.)

You seem like a person who is pretty independent and has been strong and courageous enough to find this website and ask for our input. That takes a lot of resilience and perseverence (it took me many googles to find this place!). You sound like you have been through a lot but you are still standing and moving and still seeking out answers - that says a lot about what a wonderful strong person you are and what great potential you have as you go into adulthood.

Please continue to join us and talk about your issues - definitely come back again with some more specific issues you're dealing with, if you want.

There is a book that you might find helpful, called "Feeling Good" by David Burns (he even has a website called feelinggood.com). This book has a lot of litle exercises you can practice to try and help you figure out what is going on in your head and how it is affecting your mood.

But if there are any family issues, like any kind of abuse or anything, please please seek out help, even if it is just a teen hotline or something.

Be well, hugs,
Karyn

Sounds to me like your depressed, it's not anything you've done wrong. Don't blame it on yourself. I don't know why you see a doctor cause you really should you need to be put on meds. And there may be something else going on. You'll only get worse if you don't treat it now.
Good luck!

I went through this same thing at your age and you are depressed. I think you may even have some idea as to what has happened in your past to make you depressed. Your kinda out of luck on getting any medication if you can't get your mother involved, but there are a lot of suicide prevention hot lines and other help groups you can go through for consuling. I kinda feel the same way about couseling as you do, but if its all that can be done right now, so be it. It may seem like a long time to get thorough, but life gets a little easier once you are able to get out of school. I think most schools are breeding grounds for the mental illness.