Sounds like you are aware of what needs to be done and why, and something is immobilizing you....I feel for you, I really do.

because that sucks even more when you have a clear and perfect understanding of the extent to which you are fucking up.
I can totally relate. {{{{big hugs}}}}

fake it

that sucks hun. i get like that when i hate the job i am doing and it makes it soo hard to bother trying. i hope you can find a way to get past it since that is a terrible way to continue on.

Maybe if you make lists for yourself each morning of exactly what needs to be accomplishes in that day. Maybe even make a time line of when you want to have each task done... I don't know, maybe that kind of structure would create more anxiety, but for me, I am a list person... All the best Alph, hope you can clear this up soon! Hugsxxxx

All I can say is I think I clearly understand your predicament. Depression often costs jobs. Part of what depression steals from us. I know that when it does take away our ability to work, it is a severe blow. I think an employed depressive is somehow and quite a bit better off than an unemployed depressive. For that, I hope you can work this out.

One thing that comes out is your tenure. Any possibility of a retirement?

Only because of how much suffering, psychologically and financially, would come from losing the job, I do hope you can continue to work. I guess making the point with your therapist is best.

I wish you the very best of luck.

Please do me a favor. When you get it figured out, I would like to know. I thought I was the only one that felt like you.

Hugs Alph x x

at least you aren't working at something like Prostate inspections, Looking at Assholes all day . Wait maybe it is like that

i havent been at school for the last 4 days. right now, i have a really bad cold, but honestly i'm scared of what everyone will say cus my stomache is starting to grow.