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A little worried but mostly at peace (Trigger)

newdrake308
newdrake308
I go to see a Dermatologist today. The chances of having more skin cancers are pretty high. That's because there's a family history and I've already had a few removed already. The bad type may be in the mix this time. If so and it has spread my time past 2 years is not very likely. I'm sorry if anyone is greatly disturbed by this post.
But considering my time with depression that exceeds 20 years now, I really don't find a poor prognosis to be all that disturbing to me personally. But my friends and loved ones suffering because of me possibly passing away so soon is very disturbing. I've covered some of that in my most recent journal entry. Folks please remember that love and fond memories do mean a lot. We're never really totally gone if we're still loved and remembered. My passing is not just an ending. It's my most hopeful of beliefs that it's a time of transcendece. I will still be me but hopefully the best of me is all that remains from the metamorphosis. I really do want to be closer to my ultimate parent. I love my creator very much. So this is why I am not greatly worried. I hope those that might be disturbed by this post can take comfort in knowing this about me.
Heidiclark
Heidiclark
Hello Drake! I lke your outlook. Not only is it not disturbing to me but I find it inspirational. I am facing my own mortality as well as I have a lot of health problems and am severely over weight. I literally don't know how much time I have. But like you it's not myself that i worry about, but rather my family, especially my son. He has already been through so much including cancer that I worry what losing me would do to him. And yet I keep eating and eating and eating. All I know is it's in God's hands.
Heidiclark
Heidiclark
Sorry to make this last post about myself, Drake. We dont' want to lose you. That's all I can say
newdrake308
newdrake308
Dear sweet friend your response is just a natural way of seeing our similarities. There is nothing wrong with you using your experiences to show how you feel. No apologies are necessary. Sending you huge ((((HUGS)))) of encouragement. Thanks for being such dear sweet person Heidiclark.
Desigol1979
Desigol1979
The only 'Cure' for Cancer is a positive attitude.
Community LeaderThePepperMan
ThePepperMan
So far this is just fears, please come back and tell us what your doctor says.

Gentle hugs
Diane-M
Diane-M
Hugs!
BlueYonderDreams
BlueYonderDreams
Hi Drake. I am not disturbed by this post, but I am still concerned about your well being despite you being at peace. I am hoping and praying you didn't get the worst news.
LuvMyTitans
LuvMyTitans
Hi sweetie.

We've talked about this and you know how I feel. I also don't believe at all that it's going to be the worse case scenario and I don't think you're leaving us anytime soon. You also know I have been through the skin cancer 'waiting game' with the biopsy which isn't easy and I'm ofcourse thankful that my skin cancer on my chest was squamous cell carcinoma and I had an easy surgery and that was over 5 years ago and I've only had a few places that had to be frozen since and that was within the first year. Ofcourse I'm keeping you in my prayers that it won't be bad news and I do know that you are at peace with whatever does happen. I'm just not going to let myself think about you leaving me!

Love you sweetie.

(((((((((((((( HUGS )))))))))))))))))

LMT
andrealambert
andrealambert
I like your perspective and calm about your own mortality a great deal.

I confort myself that I will be reunited with my dead wife and my dead grandparents in the afterlife and get to spend eternity surrounded by the dearly departed.

Hopefully it won't happen for any of us soon, though.

And I really hope you don't have cancer. My father just went through a lung cancer scare and the family was all really freaked out. Part of what's so hard about cancer is all of the waiting.
doghunter59
doghunter59
U know? why can't we have hugs on a post any more? Oh yeah the demo-utrar-cratic die/sission was that it was detrimental to the overall heath of every one. yeah - health

drake i sure hope U get out of this but consider this..... yours as well as mine first step away and towards death was with that first breath.

I know it suks......feal 4 ya though, really do,,,,
billwfriend
billwfriend
hugs
newdrake308
newdrake308
Okay it was 4 biopsies and over a dozen places frozen. The pain from all that freezing was not fun. But when they took a biopsy off my nose it was bleeding pretty good. They had to cauterize it. Obviously I inhaled and that smell made me quite queezy. Ended up not going to work. Good thing too. After getting some disturbing news from my little sister, my blood pressure went up. The biopsies started bleeding again. I was glad that I did not go to work.
mollgirl
mollgirl
Thinking of you my dear friend.
Community LeaderThePepperMan
ThePepperMan
Still keeping you in my thoughts.

Hope your little sister is OK.
survivor69
survivor69
TU 4 SHARING THIS WITH US, DRAKE.
GBU
DRENA B
;-O
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