Have you considered counseling? Is she in counseling for her depression? My counselor has done wonders for me while dealing with my illness. In the end, she knows your there for her through the good and the bad don't lose that.

She sees a Christian counselor (when she goes)

Thank you for responding

Michael.

I'm so sorry for everything you are going through. Depression hurts everyone involved. I want to get my husband active in a support group because I feel he needs to communicate his emotions with dealing with my depression. He is also very active in my treatment but I know it takes a toll on him. I wish this group was a little more active.

Michael: I'm in the same position you are. We have been married 51 years. We have 3 sons, all married with two kids. My wife has had depression for over 40 years on and off. You know about the hills and valley's? We have gone through I don't know how many doctors, medications, ect treatment, therapy sessions. I can only tell you to stay with her. I have had many times when I have wanted to leave but then remember what she is really like when she feels well. She is a complete different person. I love this girl like you love your wife. You know they say there is no real cure. You still have to have your own life and I don't have the answers. I sure hope everything turns around for you and your family.

Hi Michael - I can relate a tiny bit, as my fiance just started his first anti-depressant and the mood swings so far have been almost unbearable. He's been severely depressed for the past year (signs of depression his whole life) and I've recently just convinced him to seek help. I love him unconditionally and would do anything to aid him in feeling better, which sounds similar to you. In the trying times, when he yells, cries, punches holes in walls, I make sure to find time for myself. I know that I cannot be the support system that he needs if I don't take care of my own mental health. I see my family and friends often, and find time to do the things that I enjoy - exercising, tv shows, shopping, whatever it may be.

So that would be my suggestion. Take at least one night to yourself a week to do something that will bring a smile to your face and put warmth in your heart. When your heart is warm, it is much easier to be kind to those who may be acting difficult towards us. You both deserve happiness and you are working so hard to bring your wife happiness that you've forgotten that you should also be taking care of yourself. You are important, too. Don't forget that.

Honestly when a person is that hard into routinely cycling major depression and suicidal ideations, a Pastor or Christian Counselor probably is not going to work.

Your wife needs to be in steady, consistent Therapy. She needs to see a Pdoc to get her meds working. These are really important if she want's to get anywhere near Stable.

Has a Pdoc (psychiatrist) ever talked to you guys about ECT? Its usually reserved for the last possible treatment for people who are suicidally depressed and other therapies and meds aren't working. Alot of people can make it sound scary, but it can work very well.

I'm a bit different as I have BiPolar, but 7 years ago when I had Seperated from my husband, lost my job of 10 yrs., lost my 11 yr old son because his dad just never brought him home one Sunday evening after visitation and my house was being Foreclosed on because the whole year my ex lived their he never paid 1 mortgage payment.

I was done, there was not anything left for me in this world, nothing worth fighting for anymore, nothing worth going through the pain of waking up each day...I was done. Until my 19 yr old son talked me out of Suicide and talked me into going back to Inpatient care. I reluctantly agreed, basically so I could say, okay I tried I did what you asked. But 3 weeks into my stay my Pdoc came to visit me and we had a long talk about ECT and the efficacy of it with severe depression.

I did 3 cycles of ECT, started in the Hospital, then finished out patient. I had ECT every Mon. Wed. and Fri. every week for 12 weeks. I was in the Hospital for 3 months. The thing is it worked, slowly I got my will back, I felt like breathing and living again. Eventually when I was almost done I was back to my normal self, ready to go back to work, live on my own and take care of myself.

I hope that you and her Dr. find a solution for your wife that helps her.