The decision to come out is one you must make in your own time. My mother used to ask if I was gay. I said 'no' like you. When I did finally come out, she said "But, i asked you and you said you weren't" to which I replied "it wasn't your question to ask".

If you are not ready, you are not ready. When you finally do come out, your mom may bring up that you said 'no'. When that happens remind her that you couldn't have said yes because you were still discovering who you are.

As for the lesbian/bi label issue, well, feel it out. Labels are tricky because they tend to describe a very niche identity. Human sexuality is not a switch set to gay or straight, but a varied and broad spectrum. I know people who choose not to identify with a label. Still others create their own. Perhaps your identity might one day settle on being a lesbian, perhaps not. Right now, if I had to put a label on you, based on what you've described, I'd say that you are bisexual with ever increasing tendencies towards women.

All the best,
Steve

Hi I agree with what Steve had to say. I have wonder the same things but I am Bisexual although I could be happy in a straight relationship or a lesbian relationship because there is an attraction to both men and women i am Bi even though at times it seems like I like women more. I am here if you ever want to talk just send me a message.

I don't like label at all. especially when you are not sure. Although I know I'm a lesbian, I still don't like to say that I am. I am just a very happy person with someone who treats me the way I want to be treated and just happens to be a woman. But like Joe said, that has to be your decision and you will know when the time is right. Hang in there and good luck!

I agree with everyone on here, you don't need to label yourself. Or, if you prefer, you can be whoever you want. If you want to talk to your mom, just describe your feelings instead of saying "I'm..." Sexuality is fluid, not concrete, and no two people have exactly the same sexuality. The important thing is that you are happy and confident. I think thinking of yourself as a lesbian may be harder to accept because you are afraid to lose the thought of both sexes. This might be because of what society thinks. I often wonder if I would be definitively a lesbian if the entire world was LGBT! For now, I like to say I am bisexual leaning towards lesbian. I hope all works out for you. Best of luck with your mom and feel free to add or message me!

I would come out to those that matter first. If someone asks you is becuase they want you, want to help and want to support you. Pushing them away may project distrust. Hiding for who you are will only make you unhappier and lonely. I have been there in my darkest days.

You need to be careful once you come out becuase especially family may have the same process of denial. You need to do it when you are ready.

It took me a year and 3 months to be fully out. It all started when my best friend asked me if i was gay. He just got married and was moving to Madrid with his wife. He wanted me to be happy.

You need to have someone close to support you. We are here too, but you need soeone close. It helps soooo much!

Good luck!