Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
reshine
I'm so unsure of myself these days, I'm in a relationship with a man and I don't want to make any horrible decisions, I've been so good at doing that, anyway..
We've been together for almost 2 years, I got together with him almost immediately after my separation from my husband which I am divorced from now. It was to soon but now it's to late, so...
He's in love with me, deeply, and he's very sensitive, he does most of the housework and cooking, I get foot rubs and back rubs almost daily, and he's my source for recreation, we have fun together. He's an alcoholic, it's a problem for me. He wants to get married, I won't! I am firm on that but for some reason that is the only thing.
He is VERY sexually demanding and it causes alot of problems, he's starting to try to order me, then he makes me feel bad, he believes it's my duty to give it to him anytime even if it's multiple times in a day. So this is a big problem. Another reason is because I pay most everything and it's starting to really piss me off but I can't seem to tell him, why???
I don't own him sex especially when I'm the bread winner.
I also told myself I wouldn't be the main bread winner in my relationship again, a major contributor but not the main contributor. I pay 3/4 of the rent, all the electric, all the internet, and 3/4 on groceries. He says he's trying to build his business so he only pays his child support and the phones, although now I'll be paying him 25 a month for my daughter to be on his plan.
He refuses to get a job to get through the winter, his business is seasonal, I feel bad saying this but he details vehicles and cleans carpets but he's uneducated so he won't be taking me very far financially. And he told me yesterday that when my taxes come in he's either gonna buy a van or new equipment for his business, he didn't ask for my help, he believes it's 1/2 his even though we aren't married.
What do I do? Should I be happy he doesn't cheat and that he treats me pretty good and he loves me and does some contributing?
For some reason I'm terrified to be alone and he won't make it easy for me if we split up. I believe there is no one out there for me so he might be the best I can find and if I let him go I'll end up being a cat hoarder in a tiny shit hole,
He isn't a bad guy, should I be more willing to give to him because of the good he does give to me. He gives me emotionally and I give financially, this seems backwards to me and I don't like it. Should I try to?
We've been together for almost 2 years, I got together with him almost immediately after my separation from my husband which I am divorced from now. It was to soon but now it's to late, so...
He's in love with me, deeply, and he's very sensitive, he does most of the housework and cooking, I get foot rubs and back rubs almost daily, and he's my source for recreation, we have fun together. He's an alcoholic, it's a problem for me. He wants to get married, I won't! I am firm on that but for some reason that is the only thing.
He is VERY sexually demanding and it causes alot of problems, he's starting to try to order me, then he makes me feel bad, he believes it's my duty to give it to him anytime even if it's multiple times in a day. So this is a big problem. Another reason is because I pay most everything and it's starting to really piss me off but I can't seem to tell him, why???
I don't own him sex especially when I'm the bread winner.
I also told myself I wouldn't be the main bread winner in my relationship again, a major contributor but not the main contributor. I pay 3/4 of the rent, all the electric, all the internet, and 3/4 on groceries. He says he's trying to build his business so he only pays his child support and the phones, although now I'll be paying him 25 a month for my daughter to be on his plan.
He refuses to get a job to get through the winter, his business is seasonal, I feel bad saying this but he details vehicles and cleans carpets but he's uneducated so he won't be taking me very far financially. And he told me yesterday that when my taxes come in he's either gonna buy a van or new equipment for his business, he didn't ask for my help, he believes it's 1/2 his even though we aren't married.
What do I do? Should I be happy he doesn't cheat and that he treats me pretty good and he loves me and does some contributing?
For some reason I'm terrified to be alone and he won't make it easy for me if we split up. I believe there is no one out there for me so he might be the best I can find and if I let him go I'll end up being a cat hoarder in a tiny shit hole,
He isn't a bad guy, should I be more willing to give to him because of the good he does give to me. He gives me emotionally and I give financially, this seems backwards to me and I don't like it. Should I try to?
Posts You May Be Interested In
-
My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
you say he's very sensitive. not to me. he demands sex, tries to order you!!!! he's 'guiting' you also. he's an alcoholic! he pays very little to the household AND he is 'telling' you what he is going to do when your taxes come in (not asking for your input). he refuses to get a job for the winter....also. it really isn't a good thing to depend on only one person for so much. Being afraid to be alone, I get that, but what a price to pay...not so good. There is a lot of boundary crossing here. This guy sends up a lot of red flags that I think you need to look at. sounds a bit narcissistic to me. do you have kids? if you had a friend involved with a guy/person with these red flags what would you tell her or him? mho
hugs to you
rick