Codependency Support Group

Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...

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hbgdaystar 10/13/2011

How to get over Guilt Fear and anger?

I am feeling way to guilty and thats making me to go back to my narcissistic boyfriend who broke up with me. Literally was begiing him to not to break up. He really knows how to make me accept a blame and make me feel guilty abt it and addition to his passive aggressive behavior of commands i have told u to do this and u never did which means other things are important than u than me therefore i break up. Anger at myself that why do i keep falling in the same trap ... I recently realised tht i am co dependent and working on all of it... It just feels like he is a drug and i am just have withdrawl symptoms which keep pushing me stronger towards him.

Any advice is much appreciated. Thanks.

deleted_user 10/13/2011

Remember, no one can MAKE YOU FEEL anything. You do that feeling all on your own. You must claim emotional responsibility for yourself. The mere presence of the withdrawal symptoms is a sure sign that it is a close-ended (toxic) relationship. Have you read "Codependent No More?"

hbgdaystar 10/13/2011

Thanks for the support. Wekk said. What i feel is what i am making up in my head.

GlassHouse 10/14/2011

I'm sorry you're going through this. I know it's really painful.

Rest assured, your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors are completely natural. Whatever experiences formed your life formed them perfectly for this very behavior. You're who you are today and that's okay.

Now you have a self-realization, and a new door of opportunity has opened up for you. You can choose to take advantage of this opportunity if you'd like. You CAN do that.

There are a lot of resources available to you. This group might be a start if you'd like to share some specific experiences and feelings. You can also read the canonical reference on codependency which seems to be a book called Codependent No More. There are also local CoDA groups. And depending on your situation professional therapy might be an option.

It sounds like you're in a lot of pain, and recognize some serious issues (narcissism, codependency) and would like to put in some effort to make things better for yourself. You can do it!

hbgdaystar 10/14/2011

Thanks guys. I am doing better than yesterday and even better than day before... Taking one day at a time.Trying just to be positive. Yeah sometimes its dirty dark moments but most of the time its happy free and positive ones.My local CODA folks are good too. they have been helping me. Also my counsellor. I think i see the light at the end of the tunnel. The moment i stop thinking past I feel beautiful :-)

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