I kind of have the same problem
1 someone asks me to do something
2 I immediately say yes
3I almost resent it and wonder why I said yes
I think I/we have to learn to take space/time enough to actually think it through. Or is it the same pattern?

I do this exact same thing. You volunteer to help out before someone even asks. I almost instantly regret my decision to volunteer my time sometimes, knowing I have things I need to accomplish for myself before others. I don't have an answer for you but can say you are not alone in this. For me, it's just wanting to make everyone in my life happy.

1. Codependent behavior to help no matter ask or not ask
2. Act in impluse ... not thinking
3. Regret/Procrastinate ... Critic self..

Glad i caught this pattern..
I need to work on taking break before deciding like Arbe mentioned

Hi,

I have done a similar thing for a long time, too. Mine is more like Arbes, although I do not say "yes" as a knee-jerk reaction very often. Sometimes I am still caught off-guard, though.

And I was not a cheerful giver, believe me. I was stressed and resentful when I was taking on things I did not want to do.

I think the practice saying "no" as you did, Daystar, is a great start.

Shar

Shar this happens mostly when nobody is asking me anything i am just volunteering for no reason and than i procrastinate ... i think its to do with my impulses :-)

I'm guilty of that, too. *sigh* :(

I'm making good progress right now meeting people half way on things. Stating what I will do and what I won't do. Speaking up when I need a rest and not feeling guilty. It's making a big difference to my life

Ahhhh procrastination. . . one of my favorite bad habits about myself! I am a codependent in recovery, and although I've recognized and continue to work on many of the self-defeating behaviors, this is one I continue to battle the most. I have yet to figure out how it serves me to do this. I usually get stuff done (at the last minute), and feel good about it, but always wonder why I didn't do it sooner. For example, a dear friend is turning 40 on Sunday, and she lives in another state. Over a month ago, I spent hours putting together a book for her titled "40 reasons I call you friend". I ordered it and had it shipped to my house with the intention of buying her some other stuff and sending it all to her house. Well I never bought the other stuff, and now I'll have to pay to overnight it if I want her to get it in time. . .

Daydreamer73 i was able to figure out why i procrastinate until last minute... it gets my adrenaline pumping ... the same feeling i am used to from my childhood... so familiarity of known always gets me :-). I am trying to take care if it by doing things earlier than deadline.

I still have to work on my impulses ...one day at a time.

Good for you for recognizing why!

This was my Bible Lesson for Today

A Living Sacrifice to God:
Romans 12: 1 and 2

And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrificethe kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Dont copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know Gods will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Sorry i am religious challenged hamsteronwheel..