Maybe it's not a bad idea to ask yourself why you feel the need to post all these things in such a public way? Are you looking for others to validate your positive posts with the "like" button? Do you feel deflated when people don't hit that button or hit it enough? Facebook is the breeding ground for external sources of attention and validation. But it's FALSE and smokey validation at best.... it doesn't stick.

If you need to be positive (and I honestly believe you are working hard on this), then why not print out a positive message and put it on your bathroom mirror for YOU to see? Validate yourself every time you look at it. Write them out in journal that you can look back on every time you need and encouraging word. Write a letter to YOURSELF.

You don't need others to tell you that you are doing good in order to feel you are doing good.

Thats a great suggestion, I'll definitely try that. Let me clarify I am only posting things for myself and not for anyone else. It seems that the friends and family who know I'm in recovery don't want me posting anything at all. Ive always been one to be so worried about what people thought that if I needed to see a positive affermation on my Facebook page to make MY day brighter and sure it feels good if it made someone else's day brighter too, but to message me and tell me they are going to delete me if I don't stop is just mean spirited. I don't respond YET, but eventually Im sure I will have to confront them

I'm glad your doing these things for yourself. It does sound silly for them to message you and tell you that. Talk about a boundary pusher? In other words, they are saying "Please behave in a way that makes me comfortable" instead of taking responsibility for their own discomfort.... for whatever reason they may feel that is NOT your problem to fix.

Tell them that the beauty (and horror sometimes) of facebook is the freedom to post whatever you want. No matter how annoying it might be to others. They also have this wonderful freedom that's called "ignore future posts". It's very handy and I've used it multiple times.

To tell you they will delete you? Silly and game playing. Then again, maybe deleting them first to save them from your wretchedness (LOL), isn't a bad idea for YOU, since they don't really sound like the best people to call "friends", online or off!

i would not post to these people they seem to not want to deal with it and if you are like alot of us you have said these things before and not carried though with it. post here where u will get support and understanding of what you are going though

Hi,

I say if your family and close friends are responding negatively to your comments then maybe you might need to reconsider your own position.

It seems to me that family and friends are usually the ones who tell us the hard and even harsh truths about our selves whether we like it or not.

They might be wrong? and if it was just one (1) friend or just one family member then that would be different, but you are getting lots of negative feedback from several people then it might be that you are saying the wrong things?

Maybe so - or maybe not, but we must not assume that your are right and they are just all wrong - because that is going too far.

Them threatening to de-friend you is really them threatening you with their boundary, as they are putting a boundary onto you, and them telling you first is really a nice way of creating such a boundary.

On my own Facebook we criticize each other some times and give cheers other times, and I de-friend people and create new friends often too, so I say you might try asking your family and friends to explain to you why they so strongly object to your comments, and see it they might have a true point or not?

Just because you your self see a certain statement as being a "positive affirmation" does not necessarily make it as "positive" because you could be wrong.

I just do not like rejecting your family or friends when they are doing and saying things intended for your benefit - as they are trying to support your decision to leave that ex.

Just my perspective.