Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
I meet my good friends sister (A) in a club last weekend.
I say Hi and asked her how her new puppy was( Know this through Facebook). She responded he is fine and the breed was poodle. Next part was interesting, She was like can you buy me drinks tonight and her sister will fund me later. if it was old me I would have bought her drinks due to Obligation. I simply said you know what i dont have my credit cards on me and i can have my boyfriend buy you ... Hold on and immediately she said NO.
This gets even more interesting. Next day she messages me on Facebook
A- Hi I just wanted to say that you are beautiful and talented and I think u really deserve better!!! ( If I were Old me definitely would have been carried away)
Me - Thanks! what makes you feel hes not better?
A - Why do u think its OK for him to dance with other girls right in front of you? I am sorry I am not judging u i was just stating my opinion. Sorry if it offended u. I just care about u as a friend,
Me - He was just dancing, Not only with girls but guys too. I dance with guys too, He never judges me on that, We both Love dance and dancing people and whatever he does he is doing in front of me, he knows if i have a problem i will step in, I think its ok. Our boundaries are well discussed together in advance. Thanks though for your concern, I appreciate it.( Not being defensive here for my boyfriend, I didn't feel there was a problem)
A - Sure no problem. As long as ur happy thats all matters.
I see a change in me definitely that I am thinking and responding instead of reacting. What do you think?
I say Hi and asked her how her new puppy was( Know this through Facebook). She responded he is fine and the breed was poodle. Next part was interesting, She was like can you buy me drinks tonight and her sister will fund me later. if it was old me I would have bought her drinks due to Obligation. I simply said you know what i dont have my credit cards on me and i can have my boyfriend buy you ... Hold on and immediately she said NO.
This gets even more interesting. Next day she messages me on Facebook
A- Hi I just wanted to say that you are beautiful and talented and I think u really deserve better!!! ( If I were Old me definitely would have been carried away)
Me - Thanks! what makes you feel hes not better?
A - Why do u think its OK for him to dance with other girls right in front of you? I am sorry I am not judging u i was just stating my opinion. Sorry if it offended u. I just care about u as a friend,
Me - He was just dancing, Not only with girls but guys too. I dance with guys too, He never judges me on that, We both Love dance and dancing people and whatever he does he is doing in front of me, he knows if i have a problem i will step in, I think its ok. Our boundaries are well discussed together in advance. Thanks though for your concern, I appreciate it.( Not being defensive here for my boyfriend, I didn't feel there was a problem)
A - Sure no problem. As long as ur happy thats all matters.
I see a change in me definitely that I am thinking and responding instead of reacting. What do you think?
i think that was inappropriate, first of all if something bothered you it was right in front of your face and you could have dealt with it accordingly. however, i feel like she is trying to plant a seed of insecurity in you.
GREAT FOR STANDING UP FOR YOURSELF.
Yes, Cheers! Great response and as you said, not a knee-jerk reaction, but thinking and handling a different opinion without being disagreeable. That is great!
Shar