Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
Hi all
Just want to say that my brother and sister in law treat me with disrespect.
Last year i broke my wrist in india - and all my brother could do was have a go, no concern as i ended up unconscious after a fall in hospital. I ma fine now, but when i came back from india, they both picked me up from the airport - cus my mum made them feel like they had to, I had one arm in plaster and neither of them helped me. The journey home was crap and unconfortable as my sis in law didnt even speak to me. When we got to my house, they parked up outside and well my brother only took my suitcase out of the boot and that was it - it was heavy. I asked them to come in for a bit and they never bothered, said they had to go - so i had to carry my heavy suitcase in on my own. Also they didnt even ask me if i wanted any food, or didnt buy me anything - after that long journey didnt they think, oh maybe we shud get her a few bits. Im left hand and i broke my left wrist so i was pretty disabled for a while - and the whole time i was in plaster they never once contacted me to ask me if i was ok or gonna need anything, or that i could ring them if i did..Selfish fuccccccccccc s. And my mum and dad told say anything about their behaviour. So many situations that make me angry. And i text them yesterday cus my mum said about xmas presents, asking them what i want- and yeah i knew they were not gonna reply, fucking silent treatment - sorry bout the language - I mean its xmas, they dont deserve my respect- but will my mother stop and think - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Just want to say that my brother and sister in law treat me with disrespect.
Last year i broke my wrist in india - and all my brother could do was have a go, no concern as i ended up unconscious after a fall in hospital. I ma fine now, but when i came back from india, they both picked me up from the airport - cus my mum made them feel like they had to, I had one arm in plaster and neither of them helped me. The journey home was crap and unconfortable as my sis in law didnt even speak to me. When we got to my house, they parked up outside and well my brother only took my suitcase out of the boot and that was it - it was heavy. I asked them to come in for a bit and they never bothered, said they had to go - so i had to carry my heavy suitcase in on my own. Also they didnt even ask me if i wanted any food, or didnt buy me anything - after that long journey didnt they think, oh maybe we shud get her a few bits. Im left hand and i broke my left wrist so i was pretty disabled for a while - and the whole time i was in plaster they never once contacted me to ask me if i was ok or gonna need anything, or that i could ring them if i did..Selfish fuccccccccccc s. And my mum and dad told say anything about their behaviour. So many situations that make me angry. And i text them yesterday cus my mum said about xmas presents, asking them what i want- and yeah i knew they were not gonna reply, fucking silent treatment - sorry bout the language - I mean its xmas, they dont deserve my respect- but will my mother stop and think - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Also we have to learn to speak up and directly communicate what we need from others. In the car home maybe you could have said "hey a-holes how about grabbing some food since I'm temporarily crippled and may starve to death." Okay, that was an exageration but you understand what I'm saying.
Same thing with the suitcase "hey would you mind helping me with this?" The key here for all of us is to ask for help when we need it.
I have a similar situation with my brother and sister in law.. been going on for lilke 40 years now hahahah rofl...
When I had cancer like 16 years ago I had to ask my brother to come stay with me while I had this chemo that would either kill me or cure me.. He whined about coming to be with him and I said "look... I am sorry I have to ask you to come but this will either cure me or kill me and I need my next of kin to be with me in case I die... you are my next if kin.. "... he came and had a pretty good attitude.. but listen he don't get it.. still doesn't get it.
Now I love my brother.. even if I feel he gives me no support.. but.. it is the way it is.. for what ever reason (I strongly suspect sister in law has something to do with it)...
So.. ask for what you need from them.. and thank them if they come through and move on if they don't that is all you can do.. and try not to blow up at them because it will only make you look like a psycho ;) ...
Hugs