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Dont understand my dad

PAMJIT
PAMJIT
Hi this is going to be quite a long mail. Basically my dad's family is in india, and his family just use him and he cant even see.,the amount of times they have stolen money from us, and they just want want want. They know my dad is well off and they are just after what they can get, and my dad doesnt see this. He thinks they are family and it seems to be acceptable the way they behave. My dades brother has just asked my dad to help him apply for a visa in england for him and my cousin sister, and my dads done the norm, copied his paperwork and paperwork so how what he has in england. How can i get him to see what me and my mum can see?
deleted_user
deleted_user
Pamjit, the unfortunate truth is that some people simply must make their own mistakes. Looks like this one may be costly. You can warn him but it's ultimately his decision to protect his finances. You can ask him "Dad, when was the last time these people called to visit without asking favors? Or when was the last time they came over to see how you are doing (again without asking favors)?" Perhaps this line of logic will open his eyes. If it does not, you must do a very difficult thing. Accept what you cannot change.

The flip side to this is what if you started behaving towards him like they do. See if his demeanor or attitudes change towards you. When he confronts you about it, Tell him "I was just treating you like they are to prove a point". Aside from this he has to choose. It's tough I know.
deleted_user
deleted_user
The world is full of gold diggers...

I guess you can be proactive like DaSquirm mentions and ask questions that will make him think about his actions, if so recite facts based on what you've seen happen in the past, maybe he'll make the connection
koolman
koolman
I find this interesting, considering, knowing the history here, that your dad threatened to cut you off financially if you continue to see your Brit boyfriend whom he doesn't like! Obviously, money IS love, and he's spending money where his heart is, on what he loves. We all have our favoritism.

Gotta let him go, and get financially decimated, if that is going to happen.
deleted_user
deleted_user
where is the part about your boyfriend and cutting you off? i was going to say before i real koolmans post that some cultures do see this as their responsibility to take care of the extended family. not that this is ok, just saying. you cant controll him and change things but you can voice your opinion and hope he listens.