Taking responsibility for my own actions have always been a problem for me. I make excuses, blame, accuse, manipulate, cry, beg, buy...etc! But, I won't take responsibility.

I've been dating this women for a short amount of time but, we have known each other for years.

I thought that she was the perfect women for me. We both have Bi Polar mothers or at least that's our diagnosis.

She's been used by a lot of women (in my opinion) & and had a drug addiction but, now is C&S.

I on the other hand drink, smoke pot, take a pill here and there. I don't do this in excess but, it's still a problem. She doesn't have a problem nor think I do because I am highly functional and nothing lacks in my life except for my ability to have a healthy relationship.

I get upset when she does things for others. She loves to help even when it's interfering with herself. (Sound familiar). I think she should be giving the energy to herself or me but, no one else.

I got really angry and I pushed her the other day. She can't except the behavior and has left me.

I understand and I have no excuse. I did take responsibility this time. I am not contacting her because she will have to forgive me first before we can at least be friends again.

I want to give her her space...

What what the hell is wrong with me! I loved her I thought she was perfect we lived together has friends for a year she loves my cat, she's clean I'm clean. She eats I cook. We love dessert!...We love watching TV..We both work we both have friends..

Sorry for the typos & grammer errors..I'm just typing away!