What you're talking about sounds to me a lot like what they call an approach-avoidance conflict. On the one hand, you really need others, perhaps to the point of being needy. But on the other hand, you fear either rejection or abandonment, so you tend to avoid relationships at all costs. In this type of situation, it is fairly common to find yourself vacillating back and forth from one extreme to the other.

I don't know that such behavior would necessarily be called codependent, but it is something that would be expected from someone who has been hurt before in some kind of interpersonal relationship. This behavior might be viewed as a somewhat elaborate ego defense mechanism. If you exaggerate such behaviors to the extreme, you might come up with a diagnosable personality disorder, although you are no where near that point at the present time, and there's no indication that you are headed that way.

Thanks