Hello everyone, I just joined this group in need of some kind of help since the more I read the posts on here, the more I realise I'm a Co dependent.
For years I have let people walk all over me and the number one person in my life who does this is my 35 year old daughter. For years she has used me and turned me into a mental and physical wreak. I was devoriced from her father back in 1979 which was another person who mentally and physically abused me and when i got the devorice, I felt sorry for my daughter who was only three years old at the time and my mother who was alive back then helped me raise her and just us three were really the only family each other had. I have three sisters and one brother who is still alive,but I'm the youngest and they allways were Jelous of me and I put up with all kind of mental cruelty from them. My daughter for some reason can manipulate me like a puppet and I'm allways afraid of making her angry and losing her because she has been mad at me numerous times and quit talking,or having anything to do with me for years and at one point the longest was 5 years when she moved in with this man tweenty years older than her who was my age. He was an alchoholic and drug user and she took off with him and at the time was living with me and left me with all the bills and rent and I'm on a SSI disability and I was scared to death I wasn't going to make it. If it hadn't been for my church who got me a job for awhile, I would have ended up on the streets. She had my grandson Corrie while she was living with this bum and he turned out Autistic. He never had much of a chance either and she just wasn't taking care of him properly and I had to be the one who eventually reported her to Child welfare. They took him away from her and she never got him back. She wasn't even willing to change her ways for her own little son.She again quit speaking to me for a whole year this time and I as usual missed her so much that I was really sick with grief and I finally rented a car and went over to her house and picked her up and it was the 4th of July and we had a good time together then,but she still was very manipulating and telling me where to go and treating me like a chaufer. She now is only talking to me on the phone mostly and I'm really sick now with what might be Lupus and she will hardly ever come and see me.I didn't know what a Co- Dependent was, and thought it was only someone who was related to an Alchoholic,or a drug user, but since I have been reading some of the posts on here,it sounds more, and more like me. I need to break this horrible cycle with her. It is killing me. She has made me so sick and this illness seems to have developed over the time we lived together and we fought constanly and I began to get really sick and have allot of stomach and colon problems and then rashes on my skin and muscle and joint pain. I don't know what to do because I'm in constant fear of losing her and let her treat me really bad and it is killing me.