Really sorry things suck right now

We have a therapy pool in our town, 92 degree water?
I started out as a PT patient, than bought a pass
The pool works for me for at least at the time in the pool
Or there are massages
I've tried every therapy that has ever been suggested
I understand your anger, you are not alone

Hope the sun shines in your world today

Peace
Michael

Welcome to the CP group.
Sorry for the suffering that brings you here.
Hugs
jc

Welcome from me too. I've had the exact same thoughts and feelings that you wrote about many times over the years. Living with cp is hard and exhausting enough without copping shit and being judged so I try really hard to not take any of it personally anymore. Thats often easier said than done but I know what I've been through and tried over the years and I definitely know that I'd have zero quality of life if I wasn't on pain meds so I think screw you to anyone besides my doctors who think they know anything about me.

I hope coming here and connecting with others who truly understand cp helps you in some way. Regards Maddy

Thanks. Only people with cp understand what it is like day after day. It really can wear on you. Somedays are worse than others. I feel good in the heated water but after it is worse so i avoid it. I appreciate getting kind words from fellow sufferers. We really are a strong group of people. I read somewhere to smile when you want to cry shows how truly strong you are. I smile so people do not ask the questions or give a lot of advice. I have tried so many things and spent so much money trying to be well again. I have had the realization that this may be it. Accept and adjust and learn to cope. Life is what happens while we are making other plans. Hugs to all and thanks for letting me know others are there with me

Welcome to the lil corner of DS that we call Chronic Pain....and sorry that you have a need to be here.

I read your post very carefully.....I myself have been in Chronic Pain for 30 years now, not counting the baby and toddler years with leg braces and learning how to walk etc. I've had 30 surgeries in the last 17 years and recently about 3 yrs. ago just stopped and stepped off the surgery train for a while because my mind and body needed a break. In 2 weeks I start back on the train with my Oththo Surgeon for bilateral TKR's, Left Hip Replacement and Bilateral Shoulder Replacements to start.....not anything I'm looking forward to. Once we get the Degenerative Cartilage disease under control and the Advanced Osteo-Arthritus behaving, then we move to the stomach because my "man-made" esophagus is starting to come undone and its getting harder and harder to force food down, most of the time it just sits in various places along my throat and annoy the hell out of me, along with GERD so bad that if I swallow a sip of water my throat and all the way down to my stomach feels as if its on fire. Not a whole lot of fun. I'm also waiting to see the Liver Specialist at UNC in a couple weeks as my normal quarterly Ultrasound showed that my Liver was 4% more swollen and my AsPhos labs were almost triple what they should be. Just loads of fun, fun, fun!

It does get tiring, and I do get sick of it. There are times I want to take the 23 meds on my nightstand and just throw them away, toss all the syringes away and just say i'm done....and I would be, since all of my removable organs have been long gone, except for a lung, and I only have 1 of them that works well. It all gets incredibly tiring everyday. Getting up and going to the office gets tiring, listening to healthy people whine when they have a cold or their allergies are bothering them gets ofd and tiring. Going to family dinners and being treated like I'm already dead is tiring. But I get out of bed each day, and do it. Why? Because I have to. I'm the only one who takes care of me, I'm the only one who pays my bills, I'm my own main support system....so I don't get to quit.

Have you talked to your Dr. about a Surgical fix? I know down here in NC there are Laser Spine Centers where disc surgeries are done out patient with very small incisions...very low invasive. Have you checked into a Surgical option? This could very well put you back into your normal life without the hassles of Chronic Pain...

You mentioned the hassle of living under a "Pain Contract", you might read that a little closer and understand that it cover both you and your Dr. and keeps both of you safe. If you don't like your current pharmacist, ask for a new Contract and change it.

I know one thing that has served me very well over the years is getting to know my pharmacist and letting them get to know me. When I moved to NC 17 yrs. ago I made an appt. to visit with my pharmacist and explained my multiple medical conditions and the kinds of medications I was on monthly. I wanted to make sure he could get them each month, and that he didn't have a problem dispensing them. He was a very nice guy and was very good at becoming friends with his customers. I've had the same pharmacist for 17 years now and we are good friends and I've never had a problem getting a prescription. Its worth the time to get to know each other a little bit, if he can't be bothered, then I'd re-adjust my contract with a new pharmacist.

I hope that you find a little more comfort in treating your disabilities. Hang in there and don't worry about silly labels. If you don't let them bother you other people will see and pick up on the fact that it's not a big deal fr you.

Take care and hang in there.

The problem, no one knows/understands except the ones that suffer. My own family doesn't get it. My oldest adult child says things like exercise, I think your depressed, a touch of hormones, and if you went to church often that would help. If We can't get the closest ones to us to understand we're screwed. Seriously Screwed.
I feel the same as you judged and convicted. For being sick!

So much of your post mimics my feelings through the years.
Dealing with CP is hard enough. Mourning your previous you.
Taking meds never dreamt of taking to maintain some quality knowing you'll still live with some level of pain.
It's hard enough & we deal. Add the outside BS & it can make it so much more difficult.
Pharmacies can be so difficult. I'm looking for an independant pharmacy but it's hard. The contract does not bother me as I understand the whys. My doc allows me to go where I must to locate my meds knowing pharmacies don't always make it easy. Not to mention generic differences. Until recently I was set. Had a great pharmacist that worked with me, to the point of recommending treatments to discuss with my doctor. She left. Scared me knowing I'd face the same BS at some point.
Now with pharmacies buying out one another is like starting over. I've been embarrassed, humiliated & in tears. Pharmacists can hold a lot of power, some abuse that power.

No one walks in your shoes. You know what you've tried & what you go through. As hard as it is remind yourself you did not ask for this & like every other human you want qaulity in your life. Without judgement.
I don't know how to fight back but I came across a petition I posted here. At the least I can try to preserve my care & sanity.
You are in good company & my heart goes out to you.
Hugs,
Sammy

OCP, I wish it was that easy to get to know my pharmacist. I can barely get them to give me a consultation. They don't really care. I have better treatment from them after I snapped on them and told them that I can't sleep at night because of my pain. I don't see why they give legitimate pain patients a hard time. I use the same pharmacy (2 years now), will take pee test if my pain doc made me, and I pretty much follow my pain contract to the letter. At first they gave me a hard time because I was going to a GP for my pain meds, then I switched to a pain management doctor and they still tried to give me a hard time. If you are in pain management, it must mean that you're a legitimate pain patient. Why fakes being in pain just to get 3 Norco a day. Most addicts eat 30 of them things a day. lol. I mean, don't these pharmacists have any common sense. There needs to be a way to validate pain patients and give us cards or something that we are true pain patients and not drug seekers. Then they can leave is alone and go after the fakers.

I meant to say who fakes being in pain!

@jeremy seriously???????

Many people fake pain to get a script for a months worth of Norco that they then turn around and sale for $3 or $4 bucks a pill on the street....you can't be that naive.

and if your pharmacist is that much of a jerk, get a new pharmacist, you don't have to keep going to someone who treats you like that.

My pharmacist is not a jark, she is Asian lol. Nah, they are over-worked at CVS and have very little time for consultations. It's just a pill mill operation there. There is no real customer service. You call them and are on hold for 30 minutes at a time. I only put up with them because they are only a block away and I don't want to go through the pharmacy games related to opiates with a new pharmacy/pharmacist. I also know that patients fake having pain so that they can sell their meds, but they usually do that at the ER. Here in California they have a database where the doctor can see all of the scripts you have and everything. All a doctor really has to do is check that like my pain doc does. It shows that I have been getting only 1 script a month for Norco from 1 doctor. The pharmacist also has access to that database. There is no need for them to treat me like a criminal after validating that I do not doctor shop and I am on a low dose of pain meds. I would never sell my meds, I need them. I know you weren't implying that though. The pharmacists at wally world used to give me a nasty look when handing me my Norco, but they never gave me a hard time cept when they once tried to accuse me of abusing my meds. You have had some good luck with your doctor and pharmacist. You have done it the right way. You have built up a trusting relationship with your medical providers/team. That is how it should be done. I am doing the same with my current pain doc. I don't want to ever lose him, but that can all change if your or my doctor ever retires. That is the fear that a lot of us live with. Any how, I was just saying that my pharmacy is not big on getting to know their customers personally. They are a volume type pharmacy where every patient is just a number to them!

I meant to say jerk, not jark lol!

I can relate, I changed dr's and when he sent the request for my records, what he got back was a note saying I am a drug seeker. She never sent any of the records showing my birth defects, surgeries, and disability. My new dr. Laughed and tossed it in the trash! He the asked me what was going on with me. I explained to him I have constant abdominal pa in due to 2 birth defects. First I have a torch or out colon, meaning it is made up of sharp angles and is on a smooth transition of crap. Because my colon is malformed, my small intestines are malformed! I have constant cramping that renders me useless. eventually figured out the pain meds are not good for motility issues, so I stopped. My dr died recently, so, here I go again! More of "you don't look sick". Then when I tell them I need my private (non-government) disability form filled out, they look down thir nose at me That's when I pull out the medical records and surgical reports. The Gastroenterology dr's (I call them Asshole Dr's, lol) and my dr. at the time when I first got sick tried to tell me it was IBS. I proved them all wrong when I went to Mayo and I am sort of a thorn in their side. Needless to say I have to fight to get anything accomplished with the arrogant jerks!

Sorry Torcherous colon.

Patients have the right to get copies of their medical records, except in certain mental health cases under federal law. If a dr refuses to send medical records to another dr, the patient needs to get them directly and if they are refused, file a federal complaint.

Often the way a pharmacist reacts to a customer has a lot to do with the attitude of the customer. Many, many years ago before they had Pharmacy Techs, I worked a few weekends a month at a local pharmacy filling prescriptions along side the pharmacist. Often pharmacists are busy and you have to wait ti talk to them. It is best to deal with only one pharmacist when you are taking a Schedule II med. You can call and ask if John Doe is there and if he isn't ask when he works again. It may be inconvenient to deal with just one pharmacist,but it is well worth it. Be polite and respectful, even if you don't like pr agree with what they say. Drs do not have the extensive education and training in medications that pharmacists do.

Every state has a database of Schedule II and Schedule III prescriptions that are filled. Some states include all prescriptions in their databases. If you want to know what prescriptions are included in your state, put , your state name Prescription Monitoring Program, in your search bar.