I know what you mean. Its like youre in your own bubble and everyone is the other side of it. It takes a while til you feel like youre part of everyone again after a long time on your own.
Although youre surrounded by people, youre still lonely.

I get it

yes, jc, i believe i know what you mean.
after a flare, i continue to want to hide out b/c it zaps my energy and being around normies takes a lot of energy, esp when they don't understand to begin with and explaining takes a lot of energy and not speaking "our language" makes communication takes more energy.

Absolutely JC. I even withdraw from Tim and Conor- and I certainly don't want to hear from other "normals". It's like soldiers after being in a war- they won't talk about it to civilians, only to other soldiers. And we are in a war of our own.

Sandy

JC,
I totally agree with where you are coming from. It is like you are a prisoner in your own body where on the outside all who cross your path has no clue the gloom and doom and suffering you experience. The grim reality is that while you are in the moment of suffering you have to walk that path utterly alone many times and it is a very sobering reality. I GET it!! It's like putting on a mask for those who don't understand so they see the fake smile, etc. Under the mask is the real person; depressed, lonely, in pain, and most normals dont understand our pain. Love and hugs to you hun....you are not alone!

Oh I totally get it!! I was going to say exactly what Kate said!

Thank you, you guys ( ladies ).
Sometimes I feel like I'm losing my mind.

I feel like...when pain is so bad, and meds don't help enough..
I'm living in a seperate reality than those around me..
Even to the point of not seeming to have the same language..
I don't have words to make them understand..no matter how much they care..
And they don't have words that mean anything where I am.
Even " I love you " . It becomes to mean..you HAVE to keep doing this so you don't hurt me".

This is awefully gloomy, I'm sorry.
I just need to feel connected to something besides pain..
And..knew some of you would understand.

Hugs
jc

It's like being in survival mode. I agree with serenity. Can't add any more to that.

My animals are about the only living things I feel very connected to. I find myself holding my breath, trying to talk myself into doing the next thing I HAVE to do.

If my pain would just plateau...maybe...maybe I could learn to deal with my life as it is.

xoxo

I agree with Kate, totally!

Yes definately....I know no one understands the amount of Pain my back gives me. I did not understand before I had this experience. I have stopped explaining.

I also have such a consciousness of Gratitude when it subsides...this also puts me in my own world. Mostly so much is taken for granted...Genuine Gratitute is wonderful to experience!

I completely understand what you're saying, and I agree with everyone's descriptive comments. I couldn't say it better. I especially liked Sandy's comment about the soldiers and our war....so very true!

That's why I love groups like this so much, b/c other people put into words what I'm feeling but haven't thought out thoroughly or can't articulate.

YES!
The don't get it. shating wont help.

or worse they cpompare it to the tome they had ______

I think everyone said it pretty well, I definitely know what you mean, exactly what you mean. So sorry we go through this and that i don't have more to say.

JC, I don't comment much, but this really struck a chord. I still work, although how much longer?? On bad pain days I tend to hide in my office and smile at everyone through gritted teeth. On these days I feel especially alone, surrounded by good people. The "normals" have no idea how much energy I expend just trying to blend in!!
CP is not something that you can make the 'normals" understand, no matter how you explain it so it is really hard to expend what energy you have trying to get them to relate.
I don't mean to sound down, but it is one of those days. Thanks for letting me vent.
Take Care, Michelle