I am sure some of us can relate....I would not want to be without my PRN narcotics.....but it is rare that I use them....

I have tried going off some of my meds but my pain seems to be getting more continuous without let up. My doctor has never wanted me to use a narcotic drug other than tramadol which is pretty mild. My only options provided to me by the med system was injections into the spine. I worried about the long term effects of pumping cortozone into my nervous system and chose to not do it.
I hope you can find a balance of pain relief and control of your meds.

ayla, being in recovery, I have felt guilty over the years. I can't hardly breathe without pain relief. I went off everything 3 yrs ago. It was a relief to be off them but it took the Lyrica 2 agonizing weeks to kick in. After a while, I needed additional help. My PCP prescribes my medication. I'm never pain free but that's ok.

I have felt your disappointment. I had to go through the process of acceptance and the way I looked at them. I am a patient who takes medication. Not a drug addict seeking a high. I just want to have quality of life. That's everything. I hope you change the way you are looking at your medication for pain. Hugs, Dianna

Hi Ayla67, hope your as well as can be. I'm concerned for you and the dosage of meds you were on....

I don't know how much you know about Fentanyl. Fentanyl is 100 times stronger than Morphine. At the dose you were taking, 150 mcg, that's the equivalent of 483 - 520 mgs. of Morphine. That is an incredibly high dose. I'm really glad your not taking that amount anymore.

Large amounts of Fentanyl can shut your Respiratory System down and totally wreck your Renal System.

I see that you've started back on the patch at 25 mcg, which is pretty normal for a beginning dose. Your dose should not go over 80 mcg....at the most 100 mcg per 72 hours. Hopefully you won't need to take back that far.

The other problem with this is that you've not tried any other Narcotics, your Dr. stuck your straight onto the strongest narcotic pain medication available out patient. When you become med tolerant (and you will if you take this long term) there will be nothing left for you to turn to. When your at the strongest, going down to a weaker med generally doesn't work.

Have you considered asking your Dr. to try you on Morphine LA, Dilauded ER, Oxycontin ER, Methadone, etc. And there are many Short Acting meds that are used for Break Thru pain.

As for being disappointed in yourself, try very hard not to heap that disappointment on yourself. You did an amazing thing by coming off of that size dose of Fentanyl...not many could do that, so give yourself a break.

I hope that you find the med/meds that work for you.

Tomorrow will be my fourth day on fentanyl 25. I have been on as much as 150 before, without a problem. I have also been on oxycodone before, but I find that the patch works better for me, less peaks and troughs. All I need for a prn is 800 of Ibuprofen, plus I use Bentyl and hyoscyamine and phenergan (I have an abdominal tumor). I have found that over the years this regimen works the best for me.

I also use a prn pain cream which has many ingredients, including ketamine and neurontin and baclofen.

I also have a TENS unit and a heating pad.

Between the meds, the cream, the tens and the heating pad, I am pretty good to go without any prm narcotics.

I also use a special diet (extremely low fat and high protein , with no flour or sugar).

It took me years to put all of this together, so that I could finally be mostly pain free. (actually 13 years of trial and error) and even still I sometimes end up at the hospital. But right now, I think I am doing pretty well.

Today I wish I had stronger drugs. I see some of the drugs that are listed in some of the postings and I wonder about would I have the discipline to keep it in check. In Canada or at least where I am it is hard to get anything that is classified as a narcotic. I'm scared they would change me but this pain is ruining my life. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day .
That is all we can hope for.

My pain is so bad that it's taking over my life and I no longer have any quality of said life. I was on the 50mcg patch and went off, switching to Norco 10/325. They no longer work and my pain just keeps increasing. At least with the patch I had some semblance of life. I decided on my own to go off of the patch because of how people felt about it. I no longer care how others feel or think, I care about how much pain I'm in and what is going to allow me a life. My doctor is on vacation but I wrote him a letter and asked him to put me back on the patch and take me off the pills. Last night I was in so much pain that I got 2 hours of sleep and just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up. We have to do what we have to do to survive. We all have different types of pain, different levels of pain, and no-one can judge what is right or wrong for another person. Do what is going to give you relief. I DO understand. Hugs

Is there any way you could try cannabis oil? If it's legal where you are, you may want to try it. It helps a lot of cancer survivors with pain and nausea.