read that and several things come to mind
1. i was physically active and in pretty good shape. not to that degree, but one PM did tell me that my pain would be worse if i hadn't been in decent shape.
2. i was nearly killed in an auto accident at 16. my dad's friend saw it, not knowing it was me, and later told him that whoever was in my car was surely dead. the pain from that isn't what i experience today.
3. nerve damage, auto immune diseases, etc are worse than broken bones.
4. the mind is powerful and can overcome a lot, but i don't think she's talking about the same thing most of us here are.
i'm happy for her, but her blog concerns me.

Hers is a wonderful story and if her experience moves others to aspire to better living, so much the better.

My theory is that we are all individually on our own path and must walk it our own way. I used to be the type of person who could push through pain and keep going. I had to learn to surrender and become more pliable, less rigid and harsh with myself.

The important thing here is to allow the pain to teach us new things. These may be physical or they may be more spiritual, like compassion. We can't compare ourselves to others or we go mad. We each do what we can with our disabilities.

Her story could be inspirational as it could be distressing to those of us who have tried, been there, and have not "flown" like she has. And as Serenity mentioned, there are different kinds of pain and some are much more difficult to experience, let alone push through.

Reading that story, I am happy for her but it gives me great pause.

Pain is a subjective thing. There are biologic reasons why.

I am concerned that stories like this make the ones who think everyone could just "get over it" more ammo. I have had "little" things that were more painful than the "big things".

I am one who still works. Ask me how? Who knows. Do I think it is because I want it more than anyone else?
NOT ON YOUR LIFE!!!!

There are studies that show some people feel more pain than other with similar situations. Substance P elevation comes to mind.

People who put their experiences up as a "cure" etc get on my last nerve. Everyone is different, PERIOD. For many there is no cure, only help with the pain.

More power to this woman, but the mind over matter argument is frankly stale, silly, and irresponsible.

Please Please excuse my rant.

Dixie,
You are not a weak person. I had a renowned pain doctor tell my husband once that chronic nerve pain causes people to commit suicide. With a broken arm you know there is an end to it, with CP conditions the most you can hope for is a dampening of the pain, and it is very easy for people to lose hope.

T

I think that's what bothered me the most after reading her story is that I must not have tried hard enough. I do suffer from depression so I'm sitting here wondering if my depression has cause me not to push through the pain hard enough.

But on the same hand, there are days of pain that have put me over the edge! And if I do try to push through it I pay dearly.

The other feeling I had was anger......why can't I do that!!!

I'm happy for her, but her kind of story makes me feel like a failure and that it's my own fault.

And yea msnova!....it does feed fuel to those who think we can 'just get over it'!

I'm happy for her. I wish I was able to cope with cp as well as she does.

I have nerve pain covering at least a third of my body. I pray each day that this will not become chronic, but it's been 15 months now...

I am wondering if somehow, my brain's perception of pain has gotten screwed up. Not that I am psychological weak (although sometimes I wonder that, too). But that the chemistry or something in my brain has just gotten messed up, so that my perception of pain is other than it should be. Could this be possible?

I really don't know the answer to your question Cindy. Do you suffer from depression as well? Depression is a chemical imbalance and Depression and chronic pain feed off of one another.
In other words depression causes more pain, more pain causes more depression ect.

I read it and it's a huge disconnect from my life too. She's coming out with a book and is a motivational speaker, so she's got a vested interest in presenting things a certain way. I'm a skeptic, and since a broken arm can mean anything from a stress fracture (caused by g-forces?) to severe bone breaks... I find it difficult to swallow that she was dealing with a severe break and all those other issues and at the same time learning to fly, getting a degree in PE no less, etc., etc. Nope, not my life - and I think simplistic presentations like this do more harm than good for most CPers.

But to answer your question, Dixie, I do believe there is strength in the mind, that can be "fed" through meditation and focus training. Tibetan monks learn to endure significant pain as part of their spiritual practice and fMRI studies on them show differences in their brain activity. One application is relaxation breathing to get through childbirth. Another, more at the level of dealing with chronic pain is the pioneering work of Jon Kabat-Zinn using mindfulness-based stress reduction techniques with chronic and terminally ill patients.

I'm not nearly as consistent as I need/wish to be, but I can say that learning to breathe, to observe pain's ebb/flow, to find an area of focus (non-painful location), and to aspire toward equanimity (not ascribing a value judgment toward it) has been part of my arsenal in managing pain. I recently went through a difficult outpatient gyn procedure. It was hampered by anatomical problems that reduced the doctor's ability to inject or apply all of the local anesthesia, and by additional factors once the scope began. I could not have endured it without meditation and breathing exercises. In fact, the doctor and nurses wanted to know much more about it afterwards - they knew at one point that had I not had that mindset, I would have needed a second procedure under general anesthesia at the hospital. I still need guided meditation (thank Steve Jobs for ipods!) when it's really rough or overwhelming, but if I've been consistent I can sometimes just do it on my own. That said, it's not a panacea. I'm not running marathons; I need meds and ice and shots and a whole bunch else. My life is not now "normal" bc of positive thinking. But I'm glad to have one more thing to help me.

Sorry this got so long. Just wanted to both vent and share. Dixie, you are NOT a weak person. I don't think anyone (like that blogger) should set themselves up as a poster child for CP - some of our experiences aren't pretty enough for the limelight :0 and those whose are, well, it makes it rough if that's where the bar is set...

Just my thoughts. Take care, Raggedy

while her posts make me happy for her and her capacity to turn pain into monetary gain, i can't help but to at least feel the green monster come by and say things, unrepeatable, that generalize her experience for me beyond something i can relate to and into something i don't even want to be blessed with.

my personal experience with chronic, life destroying pain has led me a lot of places and most recently i sit on the list of alj hearings to come to fight the third phase of ssdi. i worked so long and so hard and yet it took months of self advocacy to break my own stigma about reaching out for help.

this woman's functioning level doesn't even relate to mine. i take my anti-d's and i get just enough "juice" to promise a nice thing or two for opal. my mother is funding dance classes at a synergistic studio that allows opal to be herself. no major requirements beyond foot wear and the recital is even optional. they perform one for the parents in studio who can't afford the 90+$ of fees for the real deal. i've just nailed down her costume wear and the rest is: toddlers choice. this means so much to me and her. but, i'm so poor that it is her birthday gift from my mother. i could have never collected the fee or the shoes by myself.

i guess i get the green-eyed monster comes up when i read such a promising young woman, living her dreams... meeting deepak and almost flitting around like a cheerleader. i think of the bones i've broken and the things i did during those times. i've not got the heart of a cheerleader, a gymnast or even an exercise guru. pain hit me in the heart and the head and i can't help it.

i was a bullheaded, take no shit, you can't fire me, i just fired your boss, type of chef and i took that to my limit. it's on me though, that i don't have the most positive attitude about being disabled while my child passes through toddler hood. it's just not me. maybe i could aspire to bring more mind over body into my life, but i am, from, years of experience just not that type. i have had major depression for two decades before the pain. i'm not a happy soldier of my own incremental demise.

there's better things out there that speak to me. pain's gift has been time. time to think, time to rest but, most vividly serious, time to create art. it's my personal shortcoming, or it looks that way, when confronted with those in denial, to art my way into a happy hole.

you simply can't go for this long with a broken arm and raise at the same time your pretense of bodily awareness or even knowledge. all i'm getting here is a die hard optimist who is just as stubborn as i am. it manifests in two non-relate able ways.

but, i like me while i'm proud of the owner of such and inspired blog. i've actually come so close to peace with myself that even my green eyes don't inspire me to do anything further than work the path that i've found works for me. my path to monetary gain from this woe is very different. i guess i've finally grown up enough to respect what we all do to better ourselves. no matter how clearly different, i can actually feel happiness for others again, knowing that the bed time i've been taking from advice it going to produce it's own well of happiness for me.

it feels good, six months ago, i wouldn't have even replied to this, but, i've grown up a bit and i've made my way past the acceptance i owed myself into a greater compassion for others and certainly a more lighted understanding of human disparity than i ever imagined i would have had, were none of this to have thrown a wrench in my spokes.

nothing like crippling pain or commitment to a buddhist monastery can give you the time needed to explore the type of mortality issues that i've mastered.

so, thanks pain.. and thanks to those who can turn shit into gold. for goodness sake, we need not all be using stock photos of us dancing gloriously on the beach with scarves to be worth our salt.

viva.

that's all.

I agree with Raggedy ann I think she has a vested interest in saying that mind over matter is how she control her pain, as she is making some money doing what she is doing and I wonder at the end of the day as she is sitting in her room trying to find a spot to get comfortable so she can get to sleep, she doesn't think the same as we do.

I think we all do remarkable things while we are in pain, Cherry works and Dixie you make soap and I take care of 5000 animals and alot of us work and etc.....

I think if we really wanted to do something and had that passion we would find a way to do it.

Good post

Raggedy, I do believe there is mind over matter to a certain extent.

Viva, I'm so sorry for all you've been through. I manage, barely, with my boys, but every time they ask for something I cringe!

Being here on DS and knowing how everyone here suffers makes me think she never really had 'real' chronic pain.....that purely a judgmental statement on my part, but really!!!

manny, there are some of us here that may have to work but its with suffering and consequences and I just find it hard to believe someone can do it with joy and a smile on their face! And just when my soap business is starting to take off with wholesale orders....I'm ready to quit! I can not keep up....I just can't do it....and I want to more than anything. I guess my mind....the mind over mater has reached it's limit!
Yesterday that post made me mad at my self and depressed. Today I just want to say: "I don't believe her!"

I don't think you are a weak person because you are not doing what she has done or, because you may feel differently than she does.

Holy cow, she has definately been through some terrible damage though. I had never heard of her before.

I agree with a lot that was said here. I also think that, for her, it sounds like she had many options and tools available to her that most of us can't even imagine. Who knows how you would feel today if your issues were able to be handled like hers were??

Furthermore, I think some of what she said is unfair. I do agree that your mind has a huge partnership in your pain. However, I don't think that just because you stay focused on the positive--you will be able to live a life as she suggests.

I think it is important to look at your blessings, to be happy for the small accompliments in your day. I think it is very important to be PROUD of yourself for trying each day. Pat yourself on the back far more often that stabbing yourself in the back.

Thanks for the share Dixe4me. HUGS to you!

Wow.....
This obviously cut right to the heart of all of our insecurities and self-doubts.....
And reality-based fezrs of societies 'mind over matter mentality..

It's been a long while since I posted about the accident I had many years ago that included multiple breaks/fractures/.........
Not gong to repeat it all now......
Just going to say that , if I had considered that the beginning/end of my chronic pain life.....well.....my life went on pretty damn well...I never considered the residual aches and pains from that as chronic pain.......

I think most of us who live....always....even with meds......with a constant level of a certain amount of pain wouldn't be much phased by a broken bone..........I know it in fact, for myself.
( unless you're poor Theresa....whose broken arm will not heal).....

I'm with brokenylk on this one....good for that young woman....
And GOOD FOR EVERY ONE OF US. Who s fighting the best damn battle they can.

I'm still sometimes jealous of healthy people...heck...I used to be jealous of those of you on here who lived 'Fuller lives than me......
But, I don't doubt my toughness, ever, any more.........I KNOW what I live with......just as you all KNOW what you live with.........and, I think we all do amazing to be able to come here and hold and prop each other up when we feel barely able to do it for ourselves sometimes...

....guess I was supposed to stop there....I have no idea why that just sent :-) :-) :-) :-)

KUDOS to us...

VIVA....

Hugs.....jc..

I really don't know what to think after reading her story.
Every single person is different. Handles things differently, has different pain levels of pain tolerance & so on.....
We most defiantly cannot compare.

It really is hard to believe that after all those injuries she is able to deal so well. I'm sure most of you know that anytime you break something or even injure a part of your body that location becomes a weak spot.

I just had a doctor tell me that sometimes all it takes is to badly bruise something, or wound an area, such as the smallest of fractures to have arthritis set in eventually. This area can become painful at some point in ones life.

I do believe we are not all wired alike.

This is going to be hard to believe but my Aunt has Alzheimers & NPH (fluid on the brain) which she now has a shunt for.
Anyway none of us knew she has Osteoporosis on the severe side. So she fell while getting out of bed & broke her knee. Yet she continued to walk, only to fall again making the break worse. This was all in one day. Never shed a tear. I got her into ER & was amazed out how bad it was.

Now while recovering from surgery on the knee she fell & broke her elbow. Once again because of her reaction we did not know how bad at first it was injured. She simply got up & continued on her way, with help of course. Iced it only to see it was swelling way to much for it to be minor.

Yet other then cringe she never revealed any real degree of pain.
This has always made me wonder. She does limp when the knee aches now.
The women tried to walk on a broken knee & attempted to use her arm with a broken elbow.
Something was/is not right there.

My PM had a man come in to one of our support groups who broke his back. He traveled the world learning about Chronic pain. Came across monks who through mediation could go without food & water for x amount of time. Can't recall the details.
Anyway he swears he learned how to take his mind away from the pain through this type of meditation.

Who knows really.
All I know Is how I deal with it. I get up & do what I can daily. For the most part I manage. I try to keep my mind busy.
Still I have those days where its just to much. I also have those days where its not so much the pain level as it is I'm exhausted & just fed up with dealing with it daily.

I help an elderly couple, more family like situation.
There are days the home care worker may not be able to get there & I fill in. I also help supervise on weekly but I can more or less choose those days except for appointments & emergency situations.

I can say with all honesty I talk myself into getting through the day. Ive went with ice packs or moist heat strapped to me.
Then I pray through the day to make it.
There are days no matter how hard I try I cannot do anything.
I know for a fact even if I did not how to meditate or whatever I simply would not make it.

Yes the types of pain can matter. Nerve pain for example. I'm sorry but when its at its worse there is not way of talking yourself through much of anything.

There is nothing wrong with any of us here. We all do our best & have good & bad times.
Its scares me when people start talking about mind over matter when fighting chronic pain.

When my PM told my husband & I that I would be in pain for the rest of life of course I was devastated. He said you'll get used to it & I wondered how the heck does one get used to this? Well to a degree he was right. What used to be a 7 to me may be a 4 now.
I think we can all handle pain that would put your non Cper in bed.

With all this said I know with every ounce of my aching body with no meds I would have no life.
Sammy