Thank you all for your support. All your posts brought tears to my eyes. It's so good to hear from kind people who share your pain....

To the person mentioning brain damage (that's all we need, on top everything else!) I read that chronic pain over the year can shrink your grey matter (but it's possible that too can be overcome? I mean, my impression is that the brain is pretty elastic?). I read this in a very interesting book called: "the Pain Chronicles" by Melanie Thernstrom. I like the book because it's both very personal as the author had a long journey before the cause of her chronic pain was diagnosed, and is very well well researched in terms of scientific advances and also the history of how pain used to be conceived of and treated. (if I remember rigth, the Mesopotamians had a bad god called "Toothache", so the cure for a toothacke consisted in sacrifiing to a good god --hmmmmm.)

If you're squeemish, just skip the part about the description of a mastectomy without anesthetic. I learned in that book that when ether was discovered as an anesthetic it met with as much opposition as we have today with pain medicine.... Surgeons argued that if the patient didn't scream during surgery, cure was not possible --I also read that many people chose death over such surgeries --I don't blame them!

I would love to hear if someone else has read this book and what they thought about it.

To Keeska, I too find concentrating on something helps. I don't do sudoku but to my surprise I'm doing jigsaw puzzles. It seems to calm me down (particularly since I'm really really bad at them and have to ponder really hard where a piece might fit!)

I'm sorry about not responding to the facebook friends. I'm an old foggie and don't participate in so called social media. On the other hand, I very much appreciate hugs and send you all many in return!

WELCOME!

We are here for ya!

Glass half full...look at how much you have accomplished and build (slowly) on it.

well katikam welcome to the group. we all need support in our lives regarding chronic pain of any kind. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. as for me, I suffer from osteo-arthritis in both knees and ended up having to have a full right knee replacement which I am just healing up from 1 1/2 later. I also had to have the left knee operated on for a torn meniscus as well as an injury so the surgeon told me to the left hand side of my left knee. he tells me that the left knee will eventually have to be replaced like the right one was. so basically I had double knee surgery in less than a year. I just turned 53 march 15th actually, but feel like I am 93. nothing like orthopedic pain. bones heal at a very slow rate. the pain was excruciating. no wonder the surgeon doesn't tell you everything. a person would never have the surgery. and in the meantime I ended up being laid off basically because the company I was working for did not wish to wait out my healing time. sucks but this too is reality. but then this was the recession. and I am still out of work. still cannot walk properly and very unsteady on my feet, but at least I do not have the pain I once had. all family has passed on and I am divorced. so really am on my own. most of my support comes from my online buds of which you have all joined. take care. hugs your friend caroline.xoxoxo.. cya..

my mind will go completely blank at times when it comes to remembering stuff. thought it was just a migraine thing. didn't realize it was being caused by chronic pain in general. I am trying to be approved for disablity, but that is a very long struggle indeed and most people are denied the first time of which I was. I am in canada, but whether you are talkiing canada or the states really doesn't matter. the trauma is still the same. I love this site. so many different support groups with so many different conditions. really is awesome. I am 53 going on 93 at times. severe osteo-arthritis. double knee surgery in the last year of which one was a complete full right knee replacement. the other knee was operated for a torn meniscus and injury to the left side of the left knee. lots of sports over the years and the right knee basically had no cartiledge whatsoever. I asked surgeon what the condition of the knee was when he got in there and he told me basically it was toast. lol. charming. as I was only 52 at the time I would have been on percocet and anti-inflammatories for the next 20 years. so I really did not have a choice in the surgery. my employer at the time was not impressed that I was having this done. well too bad, it had to be done. the pain was beyond belief. unfortunately I have not worked since the knee replacement and now the left knee is starting up as it supported the right one for years. I find chronic pain just makes us so tired. thanks for listening. hugs your friend caroline.xoxoxoxo... cya...

leall I am not surprised at all that chronic pain causes brain damage. have gone through major surgery in the last year with a full right knee replacement and a 2nd knee having a torn meniscus. the pain was beyond belief. I thought I was going to die. bones heal at a very slow rate. if the surgeon told us all of what was involved, then most people would never have a knee replacement. and for me I had to have one long before most people do. I was only 52. it was have the knee replaced or be on percocet and anti-inflammatories for the next 20 years. I had no one to take of me as family has all passed on and I am currently divorced. truly was a date from hell. over the worst part now, but now we are going to start all over again and have to have the left knee replaced. it supported the right knee for years and is also affected. not as bad as the right knee, but mri said it is at a grade 3 point of destruction. surgeon will not touch it until it is at grade 5. such major surgery when you have to have a full knee replacemnt.. thanks for listening.. take care. hugs your friend caroline.xoxoxo.. cya..

hi kiristi, I am so sorry you are going through all that you are. no I have never heard of reactive arthritis, but now I do. thanks for explaining it all to everyone. I suffer from osteo-arthritis in both knees and had to have my right knee fully replaced. the pain was beyond believe and I ended up losing my job as the employer was not willing to wait for healing to finish. I think I kind of had a nervous breakdown as I am only now 53 and basically cannot work. in the middle of waiting for disability approval. was denied the first time around but I am told that is very common. interesting reading on here about chronic pain causing brain damage. the things we learn. I am not surprised in the least.it is as you know very hard to accept that a person is unemployable especially when I want to work and I always have since I was old enough. like being forced into early retirement. I really do wish you all the best in your own struggles. I am fairly close in age to you, so your story seemed to jump off the screeen to me. I hate the label of disability. like we are somehow not human anymore. I have had alot of help actually from existing disabled friends. alot of my so called able bodies friends have since distanced themselves from me. like having a disability is somehow a disease they are going to catch. said alot more here then I intended and this seems to be turning into a novel now. this is really such a great site. I really needed to find a place to express myself. thanks for listening. hugs your friend caroline.xoxoox.. cya..

I was gonna send you a hug but you're profile is private, so here it is.

))))))))))))))))))))HUG(((((((((((((((((((

David.