Hello Paula,

Sorry to hear you are in crash mode. I used to have a little stash of Ritalin that I would use to help perk me up when I just had to do something, something important. I found it helped a bit - especially if I didn't take them all the time. I've read posts on other forums by other ME/CFS sufferers who would use the Ritalin in this manner alao.

Now, I'm out and need to beg my new doctor to help. I suspect he won't... they are so damn conservative and that doesn't help me at all. Sometimes you just have to do SOMETHING.

Maybe you could give stimulants a shot too?
Ya never know until you try, right?

You're in TO.
Hope you have heat :)

How do we do it??

We do it because life is worth living, even if it hasn't worked out to be the life we had planned it to be. Because there are sunrises and sunsets and people who care about us. Because of pets, and kids and maybe even just birds to feed. Because while it may feel hopeless at any one particular moment - you really just can't know what a moment a month from now might feel like.
This is why journals are important. Because you can bookmark good days and go back and see they exist.

We do exactly what you did, you pushed for the visits and your body just hit a wall. So, you stay home and try really hard to be happy for the rest of them having fun - and maybe ask your parents to stop by afterward with dessert to sit with you.


I certainly sense and understand your feelings of losing hope. I wish I could say when you might have a remission but I can't.
I haven't tried ritalin but I do find that if I use some sub-lingual high dose vitamin B, I can push through something that just has to happen. That doesn't mean there isn't a crash to come, but sometimes life just makes you do things - doc appts, etc.

Someone here recommended a book a while back that I've read twice now and it truly has helped me a lot. "How to be sick" by Toni Bernhard. I would pass that forward and suggest it again.

I fully understand how you feel. The ups and downs are "all part of the fun". Sorry if that sounds flippant or insensitive, but those are the words I use when discussing the myriad of symptoms and challenges. I have learned that when I sit on my pity potty too long, it's time for a reality check. I don't have to look far to find someone who has it far worse than I and then I feel ashamed that I felt sorry for myself in the first place. I hope you feel better soon.

Hi Paula! You human being you!!! (gentle smile and hug)!!

I'm right with ya! I'm going into month three of a nasty crash. I think that sometimes in our hopefulness to help someone else, we forget that we (other sufferers) are the only ones who know what you're talking about. I'm glad you wrote this post.

I have actually found myself listening to my sweet husband, praying for me and saying "God, now seriously, what good is it doing ANYONE for my wife to be lying, bedridden at home so that she cannot even make it to church".....He's so sweet, the way he prays for me!!

I've had CFS for seven years. During some of my crashes, I do think that "this will be the one I never come out of"! We have no assurance when we go down, how long it will last, and that is so incredibly difficult to live with. We have been stripped of the ability to ever make plans or promises of what we will be doing on a "good day", because we never know when those days will come.

It is depressing. We do lose hope sometimes! This is so normal, Paula! Don't beat yourself up. I can't take Ritalin or any other meds. They seem to work backwards on this body. I do know that for some folk, these kinds of drugs can give some energy, which is much needed if you have something you just MUST push through and do!

When this present crash you and I are in, is over....we will look back at it and say "MAN, that was wicked"! But we will then have some good days. It always amazes me, how quickly I forget how incredibly sick I've just been for weeks on the first day I'm able to get dressed and leave the house. We are strong!! We truly are. We keep up the good fight, find the joys in life that are attainable for us, live, love, pet the dog, listen to good music, hug the kids, sit in the park......the simple things have become our new life. And I, and I'm sure you too, are thankful for those things.

Tomorrow will be a better day, Paula!! Don't lose hope, hon!

I will write more when I have more energy but wanted to thank all of you for responding. It made me feel alot better especially because you know exactly what I am going through. Paula xo

WetNoodle: I do have electricity, luckily I wasn't affected :),

I know how you feel I could have written the same thing myself. I feel the same at times too. We go on because we have to. Just do the best we can and that's all we can do. It's not fair, I know. I started taking more vitamins to try to help with my energy levels....who knows maybe it will help a little, and a little is better than none.

I'm feeling the same way though the holidays. Regular days are hard enough but holidays add so much more stress. Just stress of being around people wears me out. Once the stress hits, then the physical symptoms; headache, muscle pain, digestive disorders, etc., etc. Then the feeling of hopelessness and that it will never end and what a waste of space I am. I haven't tried the Ritalin either but I do have a secret stash of prednisone. I find if I take 5mg for 5 days it seems to clear up any damage the stress caused. Once that crash lifts, so will your spirits. Just ride it though and the next day will be brighter.

Depression is a regular companion to CFS. Why would it not be? Hopelessness, despair, feeling like 'what's the point'? All those unwelcome cousins come a calling. Just like unwanted family members, sometimes we just have to make our peace with them. Recognize them, then take away their power.

For me daily gratitude helps, looking out at the sunshine and birds flying by. Playing with my crazy pets and hugging my son. Yesterday was one of those days I just wanted to curl up into a ball and cry form sheer frustration at the limits this illness puts on my life.

But we go on because life is worth living. My cousin died on boxing day, he was only 21 years old. As long as I have life I will do my best to celebrate it, find joy even when it hides from me and hang on to hope for dear life.

Hope you feel better soon.

I don't crash as bad as others, but it still gets so frustratingly annoying when I'm again feeling sick and out of energy. Then the wife asks concerned how am I doing. At that point part of me wants to scream. I don't know if I have the flu, but probably not it is just another CFS speed bump. My foot comes off of the gas pedal and I hope to feel better soon.
For me the best part of CFS, yes for me there is one good part, is learning more about life. I've always stubbornly tried to enjoy all aspects of life. I remember when I loved a girl in college and she didn't care for me in that way. We were friends. She wanted me to just stop loving her. I figured it was worth the pain. Now I'm using the experiences in writing books. I think about CFS a lot as I write, its kind of sitting on my shoulder as an annoying guest for the journey. If I work at anything to hard It lets me know. Good luck on your journey. I'm glad for the encouragement and help from others on here.
I had a surgery recently hoping it might help the CFS gunk. We'll see, but regardless we keep on trying. It's the way life is, life doesn't want to give up. Hugs to all.

I know how you feel, I have had to use a wheelchair this past year when going to stores because I am to fatigued to walk around, or I wait in the car. I got a handicapped parking tag , I can not believe I live like this either. Hang in there, I am in the same spot.

Happy New Year everyone!!

Thanks again for all of your support, kind words and encouragement. I don't post that often but I am truly amazed at all of the support. I am very grateful for this site and everyone on here.

I'm going to try to stay as strong, positive, happy, hopeful, peaceful as I can. I feel better emotionally and a tad physically. Boy, was it bad when I wrote this post. It's still difficult but better at least.

I have never tried Ritalin but will ask my doctor about it. Do you ever crash from it?

I wish everyone improved health, love, happiness and a new beginning for 2014!! xo

Happy New Year to you also!

Ritalin is being test-driven in Phase 2 Clinical Trials for CFS treatment: http://clinicaltrials.gov/show/NCT01966276

Yes, overdo and you will crash horribly.

Please let me know how you fare with your physician as I know I will have a helluva time convincing mine.

Nina and Carla, you are good medicine for all of us. I was caring for a 3 and 4 year old(both in diapers) at my worst time and read something with bold letters half through it that saidDON'T GIVE UP !! Since then there have been improvements with taking Garlic and having my saline implant removed, so you never know, Paula, what "help" may be around the corner. Love and Prayers, Isabelle1954