I am so sorry sovery. Occasions and holidays are the worst. Do what you need to to find comfort in the Lord and to treat yourself to something special because you deserve it. You are the reason that your ES has a bday to celebrate - all mothers understand that and know that you deserve that to be a special day. Praying for you and that this will be the year your ES sees the Light. ((((hugs)))) We're here for you and all understand too well how you feel. Hang in there.

I am so sorry, sovery, you have to go through this horrible pain. You don't deserve this. None of us loving, caring Mothers deserve this. I know what you are going through. I have been there, I have cried and cried for days and weeks over my ED and her treatment of me. I am finally coming to acceptance and it isn't as painful.

I keep gong back to that same verse in the Bible that has helped me let go.

Ecclesiastics 3:5 "There is...a time to embrace and a time to refrain."

There is a lot of wisdom in those words, as hard as it is to swallow.

My thoughts and prayers are with you through this difficult journey.

soverysad., so sorry for you and your son. It is hard--if possible at all-- to be happy under estranged circumstances. Give yourself permission to grieve and permission to move on. (preaching to myself here)...Go to a movie, window shopping, engage in some labor, a hobby or chore to ateast have a minute of peace. listen to the Word on tape or through your phone. Tbere also are many uplifting sermons on You Tube. It will no be enough, but it will make you feel a little better.blessings

Take time today to remember the little boy not the ES. Then do what neelie suggests. Tomorrow is another day. Time and God do ease the sadness and pain. Hugs and Blessings.

So sorry for your heart ache. As time goes by each of us will have to face a birthday that will cause us pain We can'r avoid it so we must work through it. We are here in love, support and understanding. Find some thing you enjoy and do - with some one who cares about you but who can be silent and peaceful without questions or any pressure. Our prayers and hearts are with you. God surround you with His peace. Read or listen to His words

These are such hard days. Please remember you did not cause the estrangement. You are a loving mother. We are here for you and we do understand. We pray one for another. We pray for our EC that one day they would obey God. Those EC who say they know Jesus ( our ED ) are without excuse. Hang on to The Lord today. He will bring you through it.

I feel your pain. I had hoped to make my son's "golden" birthday very special but the estrangement came and that never happened. I think of the 7 birthdays I have missed with him so far, that was the hardest. And I am sure he was thinking about how special our family makes those monumental birthdays, he had to. But the day came and went and life moved on and God held me in his arms. He is holding you too.

Sometimes I feel like remembering my ES as he was when he was little and cherish the time I had with him. Now he is someone else who is a totally a different person altogether. Im sorry for your pain right now, we all know what it feels like and it cuts like a knife. May the Lord comfort you now.

soverysadmom...I understand what you are experiencing.

In the beginning of the first year of my estrangement, there were days when I cried until there were no tears left..dried up the tears. Sometimes it's perfectly fine to let the tears flow even though the people around you just may not be so sympathetic after all the crying.

God gave us tears for a reason. Other animal species don't cry like we do..though I don't understand why this is the way God intended it to be??

I once read a little poem about what a "Mommy" does all day when my kids very young. It always stuck in my head and heart. It goes on to explain all the things a "Mommy" does in her day..cleaning..cooking..driving everybody to their schools, sports activities, etc..etc...
But...she leaks!! Why does "Mommy" leak?? She cries tears of joy, tears of sadness, tears of frustration and of tenderness..all on behalf of her children.

Just because our kids are now grown, doesn't mean the "leaks" don't happen anymore. Maybe we leak more as we age! (in more places than we'd like!!)

Your tears are seen by God, so our mine, so are everybody's tears. Cry if you need to, just know that the crying spells should decrease as the time goes on. It's human to cry. I never tell anyone "to stop your crying"...because, as far as I've experienced, sometimes the tears are healing.

Remember, the shortest verse in the Bible..."Jesus wept." He was looking over the city of Jerusalem..and I know that He wept for a reason..His heart was tender to all the pain that was in that city.

Don't feel bad about weeping. Get the tissues out, have a good cry, then let God heal your heart and give you HIS joy..the joy that the world cannot take away.

(((hugs)))

Maddie

What powerful words about tears Maddie - thank you. It is very easy for me to cry; others not so easy. But after a good cry, I always feel better and as I cry and pray, God lifts me up and for that I am ever so thankful.

((Sovery)) I hope you are feeling better today. You are in my prayers.

So sorry you are dealing with this, but you are NOT alone. give all your hurt to God and know we share in your grief. We all have been there at some point and we don't have to go through any of this alone, we have each other and our Ultimate Father!

Thank you all for your encouraging words. I find comfort with all of you here. I'm so sorry we all have to endure such horrible pain. I got through the day with the Lord. DH and I cried but did go out and had a nice meal.

My ES birthday is coming up in a few weeks and I go through the same pain ...year after sad year....it has been many many years for me. but the hurt is still just as bad. and now with number 2 Son doing the same it is double whammy pain. please hang in there and do something good for yourself.

Sovery sorry I didn't see this right away. Birthdays and holidays are the worst. Mine left with a note and that day is really hard too.
Sad make sure you take your same advice. Praying for you and everyone on here.