claudiajane i see pictures of my GS in your letter,he will be 3yrs old never goes outside except with me and DH,the 3 dogs are gated from the small living rm so i see my gs fenced in,he cant get potty trained cause he cant get through,no interaction with children at all his vocabulary is of few words,we have central a/c so i dont know what dil is talking bout.When he comes to our home he runs neverwalks but when we take him to the park he is scared to walk.We have bought him toys for outside but he cant go due to the dogs droppings even a bedroom he doesnt haveone dogs took it over.Thanks for listening to me ramble but i need to talk to someone

Praise God for working out things with your gc. God bless you.

Lindajoan, my heart breaks. My goodness from the additional information any reasonable person WOULD see that the DOGS are their priority. Your GS is not.

That is why it is important for you to be in his life. They will have to deal with the aftermath of their behavior when he starts preschool or kindergarten because he will be a special needs child.

They cannot ignore their son then. And if he still has a skin condition that interferes with his education they will be called out.

And the thing is a neglected child does not know he is neglected. He thinks what he has is normal. And as he grows up he may forget stuff you never will BUT he can remember love and hugs and presents and nurturing from you and your husband now and in the future. He knows love.

I sent so many boxes to my little grandson filled w toys books clothes etc that when the ups truck came he got excited BC he knew there would be something coming to make him happy! My daughter told me this.

Now he is well taken care of....toys outside gym swing set. Swimming pool. Dune buggy. Etc.he has horses. Dogs. Cats wonderfully decorated room with a car bed that has headlights...etc.

But he has no family close by.. They all live in se ...and he has no children to play w except his baby sister. So he is simply behind. Would he be that way in tn or fl? I doubt it BC his extended family would be around him...he was socially fine at nine months...we all saw and played w him.

I pray I am wrong about his daddy...maybe he is controlling his old...but I said to myself if his father continued the way he was and my daughter did not interced, my GS would hate his daddy and blame his mommy for not protecting him. I believe things have shifted...my sil goes to work about 7am and doesn't get home until around 6:30 pm..so my GS and gd are under my daughters care....and she is a good mom.

But if they wanted what was best for their children they would not have discarded the families and they would not be living in isolation...that is my opinion. And they did this by choice.

My hope and prayer is my GS can overcome his issues and grow in speech and interaction w other children and be successful at Montessori.

But I have accepted that I will not have a relationship w my GC. Even if I went once and twice a year so what. I've been robbed. And they did that. And I am single....divorced and my daughter always said she would be there for me. Well she isn't and won't be. That's what he bottom line.

As long as you and your husband can maintain a relationship physically w your GS you can show him your love.

Claudiajane, I am sorry that you can not see your gc more often due to location. It seems like this may have been your sil's choice of place to live. Distance is difficult but it is good that your daughter wants you to be there. Pray about visiting and see if you are led to go. It is true that there are so many early intervention programs in the public preschools. Schools pick up problems very early. So much can be done to help children.

We will keep your gs in prayer edr. It is also true that once your gs is in a school they would question the rash and not allow it to be ignored. Schools are on top of things these days. They can go above the parental rights which in most cases is for the benefit of the child.

If you think he is suffering and not getting the right treatment , then don't you have an obligation to tell someone? Maybe he has celiac disease or some other cause like an autoimmune problem contributing to the rashes. I don't know the right answer but if you don't do anything , will you regret it later? The safety of the child should always come first, whether your DIL likes it or not.

My GS took allergy shots for 4 years every Wed. My ED said he was allergic to grass. Hello! They are both smokers and they have 2 dogs in the house. I kept my mouth shut but boy did I hate that. Any idiot would know that smoke and dogs don't help allergies. He's 10 now and outgrowing this but I felt so sorry for him.

I know how you feel. Keep your mouth closed. You get to see the GC. That is what is important. I bet you have enough problems with them without adding another one.

Thank you for sharing your story with me.And i am sure you know what i am talking about.My husband and i are going to sit with our hands tied and continue to see him.They will have to take him to allergist/dermatologist eventually.The more we talk to them about it the longer the more they ignore us.We will keep our mouth closed until we can no longer can. And will continue to pray for my little guy.Thank you again for sharing your story i really appreciate it.I am going to get him friday for the day and give him a spa day lol.