Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
First off, I'm a guy. And guys just don't write journals. Except if you're Samuel Pepys and it's London in 1366.
What I try to do most of the time is not think about what I did and the loss I've experienced. Writing a journal just keeps it alive. And I'd find myself writing about the things we did and the things I miss. That just seems masochistic. Sure, there's the changes I'm making now. But even they are a reaction to what I did and what I miss. For example, I spent some time today blocking my xAP on the phone, blocking her e-mail, deleting her photo from her phone contact. I can't bring myself to delete the listing. I also deactivated FB yesterday, but, again, this is all in response to my loss. And I've made plans to volunteer locally, but, of course, the only reason for that is. . . you get the idea.
So, why bother? And any word from the cheating husbands would be appreciated.
What I try to do most of the time is not think about what I did and the loss I've experienced. Writing a journal just keeps it alive. And I'd find myself writing about the things we did and the things I miss. That just seems masochistic. Sure, there's the changes I'm making now. But even they are a reaction to what I did and what I miss. For example, I spent some time today blocking my xAP on the phone, blocking her e-mail, deleting her photo from her phone contact. I can't bring myself to delete the listing. I also deactivated FB yesterday, but, again, this is all in response to my loss. And I've made plans to volunteer locally, but, of course, the only reason for that is. . . you get the idea.
So, why bother? And any word from the cheating husbands would be appreciated.
I think where you and I differ is that my xA was not physical aside from me kissing her. In retrospect I really didnt have the level of emotion for my xA that it seems as though many in this group had, and her going off the deep end, I can tell you my emotions have gone full circle hatred. But hey, I digress and get that I am getting what I deserve. Wow, did I just go off on a tangent.
I am finding that writing posts here as well as reading them has been very helpful. I check in several times per day.
If you try journaling let me know how it works out
http://www.dailystrength.org/groups/cheatersanonymous/discussions/messages/19172037
See, you feel better already, don't you?
Clover - thanks. I feel better already :)
I'm gonna read the link from DF and maybe I'll give journaling a try.