I deleted my earlier comment. I get very defensive when a BS comes here to OUR forum, OUR safe place, and starts throwing the "how dare you" around. Then you claim we're attacking you, report us to the mods & we're threatened to be removed. If we came to the infidelity site, you know how we are treated there but we can't complain to the mods bc we're lowly scum sucking whores who deserve to be stoned to death.

Honestly, I can't answer why I did it. I think back to that time right before it all started & it just seems like I was in this dream I didn't want to end. It started as friendship. Guess I just wanted to feel desirable & wanted again & he said all the right things.

You come here asking why. Then proceed to bash us & tell us how awful we are to have "ruined" your life & others. Believe me, and I think I speak for all us lowly CS's, we would take it all back if we could. You're asking us to do the impossible......undo what we've done.

Its not holier than thou, its better character than thou. Perhaps a bit of psychological transference has occured and no, youre not the specific people who've harmed us. For those trying to better themselves, kudos. You've recognized the errors of your ways. Still, it should have never come to this. You could have had the decency to in the relationships you were in the first before playing both sides and having your cake while eating it at home. It's one thing if people fall out of love it's entirely different to use that love to your own benefit while seeking relationships on the side. I don't have to be a Psychology major or know you personally to be able to judge your actions from afar because here they are plain to see for all the world. There are a large number of reasons why people in the West specifically the US end their marriages early. And a lot of these divorce stats we're already high before social media and a lot of the other modern things people use to scapegoat deviant Behavior. If you and your partner were having problems you should have worked them out or at least tried and if you recognized that there was a failure there, to end it and Then seek out other relationships in that order. Again, ability to predict the future and obviously no, you cannot take away the past or reverse this damage. It just sucks for those you have hurt that you couldn't have had these Revelations a little bit sooner. It also sucks that many of these victims couldn't get the best of you, noooow youre working on betting yourselves for the next people, better late than never is of little consolation to me :( I'm going to have to avoid places like this in the future. My hurt is too fresh and you're too easy a target for transferrence. Peace

I feel as if you are misunderstanding me on purpose. Perhaps simply ignoring me would be best.

Yeah... you guys came to the wrong place. 'Cheaters Anonymous' seems fairly self explanatory. Though I get just wanting your voice to be heard.. it's how many of us ended up cheating in the first place.

:)

We are used to BS's coming here, adding to discussion with opinion from a BS perspective. Yes, we still see thier scars sometimes in their posts..
You guys are here to take out your pain on us... So, you had your say.. Now move on!

The truest of true things here is that people who have had affairs are all different. If I were a narcissist, I certainly would not have been snared by a sociopath. Painting affairs with a broad brush is just some Chump Lady nonsense.