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Anxiety Attacks During Break Up w AP

restoremylove
restoremylove
If you have read my stories you will know I'm really struggling with moving forward and loosing my AP.

Did anyone going through the early stages loose tons of sleep and/or suffer from anxiety attacks? If so what did you do and how long did the last?
shoretimenow
shoretimenow
BS: Betrayed Spouse
CS: Cheating Spouse
NC: No contact. No texts, emails, voice messages, IM's, calls, stalking their facebook or other sites....
AP: Affair Partner
IC: Individual counseling MC: Marriage Counseling

Day 7 is hard. It IS devastating. I get it. I'm at 6 months in a few days and it can still be hard (but much better). I never in a million years would have thought the loss of the A would be so hard (and I ended it b/c he is a jerk) to the point that I need counseling not only to get over it, but to forgive myself, to move forward, to work on what I have at home, and to never enter another again. I haven't . And highly, highly doubt I ever will. Its so not worth it.
Despair999
Despair999
And yet, if AP called, I'd go running. That only adds to the anguish. What really gets me is that AP so readily and with finality cut me out of her life. I know intellectually that it couldn't have gone on forever, but stil . . .it helps to know I'm not the only one.

Speaking of working on what you have at home, how is that possible. I have uffered from depression for 20 years, so I have a history that my family is well aware of. And, coincidentally, were having work issues -we run our own business- that are sort of a cover for for black mood. But how do I even approach working on my marriage without coming clean, which my gut tells me is a really bad idea. How do I explain my crisis when I'm pretty much beyond the midlife crisis years?