Caring For Aging Parents Support Group
Caring for aging parents can be a difficul time as we become the caretakers for our parents. This broad responsibility can encompass such services as assisted living, adult day care, long term care, nursing homes, hospice care, and in-home care. Whether you have just started caring for your parents or just need a place to talk, we're here.
Hi all -- am wondering if I can get some input from you. My mom at an otherwise fairly healthy 93 is showing some signs of dementia -- what a very difficult word to write about a brilliant, organized, ultra-logical mind.
There's a pattern to the subject matter of repetitive questions -- especially when we're out to dinner, whether my brother or I might want to take home the part of her meal that she couldn't finish. Every couple minutes at least.
How have you handled such situations? Do you just answer it afresh every time as if the first? Or try to get the person to recognize the obsessing?
It's weird -- there is a different look on her face during such episodes -- like she's in a mental zone that is less functional. (And when more functional, such questions would be the regular nagging and chain-yanking from the controlling Mom who we love. Gotta keep some sense if humor!) Seriously at more lucid moments she would recognize the repetition, short-term memory loss etc. And being more physically active does appear to improve her brain function.
Thanks for your feedback.
There's a pattern to the subject matter of repetitive questions -- especially when we're out to dinner, whether my brother or I might want to take home the part of her meal that she couldn't finish. Every couple minutes at least.
How have you handled such situations? Do you just answer it afresh every time as if the first? Or try to get the person to recognize the obsessing?
It's weird -- there is a different look on her face during such episodes -- like she's in a mental zone that is less functional. (And when more functional, such questions would be the regular nagging and chain-yanking from the controlling Mom who we love. Gotta keep some sense if humor!) Seriously at more lucid moments she would recognize the repetition, short-term memory loss etc. And being more physically active does appear to improve her brain function.
Thanks for your feedback.
Has your mother had an evaluation by her doctor? It doesn't sound from what you've stated that she's had an official diagnosis yet?
You'll find with dementia that when they're in a familiar environment that they're more functional than when they're out in an unfamiliar one. At least that was the course for my father and mother-in-law.
For both of my family members that suffered/suffer from Alzeimers we never brought it to their attention when they forgot something. It just didn't serve any purpose as they'd forget again anyway and just caused them discomfort when they realized they'd forgotten something or repeated themselves over and over.
I'm sorry to hear that your mother has symptoms of dementia. There are medications that she could take to stave off the symptoms of dementia providing that is what she is suffering from. A full exam would be called for to rule out anything else that could be causing the memory loss.
Keeping her active and engaged is a huge help.
Best to you and your family.
PD
Usually signs of dementia first appear later in the day. The brain is just tired. It's deceptive because the same person is very different early in the morning. Another common early sign is confusing night and day.
I wouldn't let this upset you too much. Get mom a full physical to rule out hypertension as a cause. Then just enjoy your mom. Try to pin point the time of day or other pattern and avoid taxing mom at these times. And when she does get into the repetition try acknowledging her and then changing the subject. Distraction is the greatest tool in dementia.
I don't think there is a right or wrong answer here.