Most older ppl want to remain in their homes, but it tends to place an unreasonable burden on their families.

Glad you are looking for information.

Unfortunately all options are extremely expensive.

To get on Medicaid Mom would have to sell her house and go broke before her care would be paid for.

Good luck. Believe me I totally know how tough it is!

I agree, get your information NOW!!!

Gentle hugs, I know how difficult this is for you

we have to do what we think is best when we can't do it all ourselves.

I'm going to start taking the tours, also, after the tax season. It is sad and I am depressed thinking about it, but Mom is 85 and I know that at some time she is going to need a medicaid home to move into (unless she goes quickly.)

This is a great forum - lots of good support and kindness.

I have my dad in an assisted living facility and he wants to go home. Home is not an option for him, I sympathize with him, but for his safety he can't live alone. Do your research and do what is best for you both.

Amen to all of these comments. I tried staying with my mom in her Independent Senior Apt with help coming in for the time MedicRe would pay for ...long story short, I had the added burden of managing and supervising the 15 different people providing care, as well as basically doing everything during the times they weren't. I was unable to finish a meal or get any sleep. Lasted about 10days before Mom went back to hospital after falling...on the day we were going to try having an aide spend the night so I could sleep enough to be sensible for Mom's neurology appt the following day. BTW, the overnight aide would arrive at 11pm and needed to leave promptly at 7am. And we were lucky to find someone available.

Usually, due to our tight work schedules it is possible that we cant pay necessary attention and care on our parents health. My grand mother is a Dementia patient. I was supposed to take care of her during my teenage tenure in the absence of other family members. But presently am relieved as i have entrusted her to a responsible caregiver from a private nursing service provider. The caregiver is now handles her every health issues and routines, which resulted my grandmother physically and emotionally fit.

yesterday the oncologist took one look at my mother, who readily agreed that she is unable to do anything for herself at home anymore, and told her she NEEDS to be someplace where she is not alone, and can have all her needs met. She totally refuses. And I just found out that my brother told her if she wants to stay at home she can. I thought we had agreed she would be safer elsewhere. I GIVE UP.

do not give up. Talk to your brother...tell him what the doctor said, get him back on the same page and TOGETHER you tell her that all of the three of you agree that she needs more care...and you will visit with her every........days and call her daily.
if it is progressing, she needs more care, and professional care to keep her comfortable and partially happy.

Give it up....to your brother! Ridiculous as it sounds, maybe you have to go thru the motions of letting/making your BROTHER try to arrange everything so Mom can stay at home. How's that gonna work? Let/make him figure it out, I.e., that it won't.work. You are allowed/required to say that you have reached your limit and cannot be the catchall/default/go to person who everyone assumes can do the impossible. Take care of yourself and stand your ground.