Wow, that is a hard one.

Falling down can really hurt, so I can understand her fears.

Forgive me if I don't remember, but are you able to get your mother up from bed, chairs, etc by yourself? (My dad was so big that I could not do more than offer him minor help. There was no way I could have helped him get up if he fell down.

Perhaps you can go to her PT sessions and learn ways that you can help her get up? There are methods that make it far easier. (I was lucky because my wife is a nurse and knows a lot - but not all - of the tricks to helping the elderly up and down.)

Gentle hugs

Hopefully while she is having Therapy, they will help her build back her confidence. I use to worry about my mom falling all the time because she was so frail and just knew she would break something. I was amazed that when she did fall, she never hurt herself.. Is it possible to get her a walker to use when getting around the house? My mom use to hold onto the walls and whatever else she could as well as a cane. Let us know how she is doing okay? Big Hugs GB

My mom is in a wheelchair and has a huge fear of falling....becuz she has fallen a few times and always hits her head. So far she hasn't had anything break, but I somehow see it in the near future as the independent living facility where she lives insists she walk and got her a walker. She admitted to me the other day that she is weaker than she thought and I haven't seen her use the walker.

If you want to help your mom from a sitting position, stand directly in front of her. Reach under her arms and gently grab her elbows and have her grab yours....gently pull her to a standing position. I learned this in working with some of my elderly clients....they taught me :)
It works like a charm no matter the size of the person. It gives your mom perfect leverage and you won't hurt yourself....a win win :)

Perhaps a walker or a cane for your mom would give her added assurance and security? I like those walkers with a little bench for sitting should they get tired and need to rest. They also have a small compartment under the seat for putting their small items such as ID, keys, and cell phones, etc.
Good luck and keep us informed.

have they checked for low blood pressure and vertigo?
that would also add to fears...
my husband, on new meds, has to sit up in bed and just stay there a minute or two or he would fall straight into the wall across the room. He is 6'5" and I am 5'6' and he out weighs me by over 100 lbs...
we set protocols up...and now his meds are reduced and things are better for him.
I haven't had this issue with my mom...she is the opposite and sets herself up for falls, carrying things down stairways so she can't hold on to railings, etc. somehow she thinks she will just bounce when she falls.
If PT doesn't solve the problem, maybe consult with an OT...they do living situation adjustments.

Thank you all for the responses. Sorry I am late in responding. I have been so busy and stressed over this.

ThePepperMan - I can't get my mom up on my own. When she gets fearful she also rejects help.

So far they have her walking with a walker and practicing standing up/sitting down, but she is not getting over this fear at all.

I don't know if this helps or not, but when my dad was in the nursing home he had trouble getting up. He was too big for me to help, and it took 2 strong PT men to get him up safely. They make mechanical devices that can assist getting people up. I don't know if they work for somebody who has fallen down, but they sure worked wonders for getting my dad up from a sitting position to a standing one.

I don't remember how much they cost, might be a lot, might me reasonable.

Is she coming home to live with you or does she have her own residence? If she has her own, there are choices for her to make and you as her only caregiver. Can she manage taking care of herself on her own? If she has these paralyzing fears that are going to be a daily cause for concern then perhaps it's time for her to be in a facility where her daily needs can be met.

I would get a handle around that now rather than wait till she gets home and find out first hand that neither she nor you and she are capable of taking care of her. I'd talk to the facility and tell them you need her to have a psychological assessment to see if she's emotionally capable of being on her own.

These emotional instabilities can be quite crippling, I feel bad for her but the only other option is to have her come home and just deal with whatever comes.

Some older people have railings installed around their houses so there is always something to hang on to.

I live with my mom. Right now I just don't see how I am going to take care of my mom with this crippling fear. We just don't have the resources to get people in to care for her. I fear a nursing facility is inevitable, but it leaves me out in the cold.

I am trying to get the rehab to bring in a psychiatrist to talk to her because I don't know what else to do.

Check with your local Catholic Church Charities. It doesn't matter what faith you are.....they help everyone.
Catholic Charities usually help by sending helpers (experienced) with making meals, bathing, helping them get dressed, etc for free.
It is worth checking into (((((Hugs))))))

Thank you for the suggestion!

Pepper Powered Hugs!

Thank you for the hugs!!

Okay Blue, update?????? What's happening in your home? How's your mother doing? How are you doing?

I agree with the statement of pepperman, falling down can really hurt. You can console her by spending extra time with her.

You can also attend counselling session with her, sometimes fear built a strong place in mind. Care and affection can help her to come out with this difficult situation.