A friend of a good friend had this happen to their dad, and it did not end well. The lady ended up taking their dad to the Philippines and is controlling his life and his money.

Please contact a lawyer AS SOON AS POSSIBLE and tell her or him what is going on. There may be nothing you can do, there may be a lot you can do. But you need legal advice.

And you need it fast.

Gentle hugs

Absolutely contact an attorney to find out what, if anything, can be done on your father's behalf to protect his interests.

Oh gosh what a mess! Was your father in his right mind when he married?

Since they are legally married I doubt if there is anything you can do, but might as well check with a lawyer.

I asked my friend for an update, and he told me that his friend's dad is back. His wife spent all his money (or took it all) and that all he had left were some stocks that she could not figure out how to get her hands on.

It had other bad aspects: she did not want anything to do with him, so she hired prostitutes so he could be satisfied.

So he is back, a man broken in more ways than one.

Please let us know how it goes for you.

Oh boy! I just remembered another story sort of like this one. An older man I know moved to the Philipines. (sp) to marry a younger woman,

She had him hook line and sinker. It seemed ok for a while but she sold all of his stuff and spent all of his money before she dumped him.

Tragic!

I've contacted lawyers, immigration, and immigration lawyers. She is taking him for a ride. My dad was always good with money, but he jumps when she wants anything. We are even considering bring her here at this point, so we can care for him. I've never seen him ruled by anyone in my life.

It is HARD to walk through this one. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, not even the people in the USA who helped him and encouraged him to do this. I want to tell them to keep their nose out of our family! After all, I don't interfere with or in their family relationships.

His mind is felling him, and sometimes he tells me he having trouble with thinking straight. Then he will say that is why he needs her. He doesn't see what she is up to at all. Again, not like my dad. 8 years ago, my dad would have never done anything like this!

Going through this, I believe people should set 4 or 5 people they know love them and know who they are to have the ability to stop them legally, as lone as two or there agree something should be stopped. People need to protect themselves from old age. Sorry, a little ranting there.

ThePepperMan was it just the money running out that got your friends dad out of the situation? Does she or he have any tips to pass along?

The day isn't too far off that he will not know who she is. Both a blessing and not. I think at that point we will be able to get him home. I told him my concern for him being other there not able to read the language, getting lost, not knowing anyone. He just said, "I hope not". It didn't sink in like I was hopping. Believe me, if there was some sort of de-brain washing boot camp for older people, I'd have him picked up. At this point, anything said he doesn't like makes him mad. We don't want that, and we don't see the point in it anymore.

He has people in his life that talk against us. And tell him not to listen to us. I ask him when the rubber hits the road where will those people be? I tell him, his family will be there for him taking care of him.

Sorry, for the typo's. I don't see an edit button.

Thank you all for your support and encouragement! It's just been my siblings I can talk with about this.

I can't trust anyone which is SAD.
People tell us they understand and agree with us. Then turn around and create strife between us and our dad. Just can't understand anyone not getting it ... I guess if it happens to them a light bulb would finally come on. :'(

My friend's friends family tried all they could, but their dad was of sound mind and he married her.

If your dad has not married this lady then move fast! Get him declared incapable of making decisions. Get as much documentation as you can. Get yourself or one of your siblings placed in charge of his money before she has legal control of his money.

If you can, try to get her investigated. If she has multiple marriages to older men a judge may look as that as evidence that she is a predator who picks out vulnerable men.

Continuing hugs.

Older men want sex in any way they can get it. That is how these female preditors get away with what they do.

I place some of the blame on the geezers for being ruled by their dicks

That was a bit harsh. I think that anybody who has recently lost a spouse, especially a long time spouse, is very vulnerable. Both men and women in this situation can be easy prey for con artists who know how to turn on the charm.

I hope I never get to that state, but if I do I hope that my children would make the effort to pull me back to reality.

get proxy from dad to control his affairs and money ASAP.....that is what the lawyer is supposed to be for....you are screwed when his money is in her hands.....

He married her in the Philippines. I do not know if that makes the married in the USA? I think the church she goes to there would have said something about her being married if they know of any marriages.

One thing he doesn't have a lot of money to give her, but she is still living better than she has in her life. She is pushing him to raise money to buy her a home and land.

I was fortunate enough to have him with us for a little while. I recorded just about every moment with him on a GoPro. I am working on collecting as much information on his health as I can.

Now, it looks like I am going to need to befriend her in this effort. Talking about HARD! Not something I ever thought I could be capable of handling. God has given me more strength than I dreamt possible. He was here saying ... my wife this ... my wife that ... the love of my life ... bla, bla, bla

Thank you ThePerrerMan. This isn't anything my dad would do 8 years ago. He would have been against it. And he's 86! He said he was lonely.

Believe me we tried to reason with him. You need to set it up to protect yourself. Make it to where you need two or three to sign, so it makes it harder. A will stating it can't be changed if you do things proven outside your character.

billwfriend, he will not do the proxy to control his affairs. Anything he gets he puts in her name. He says, "because love is trusting". Makes me wonder where he's hearing that ...

Faith, what have the immigration attorneys told you about the validity of their marriage?

This is such a sad situation. Everyone needs companionship and I don't blame anyone at any time after the death of their spouse to get involved with another person.

I watched a program last year on this subject and it was absolutely appalling as to the extent of what these predators will do. Besides hiring a private investigator to have her followed, I'm not sure what else you and the family can do to protect his interests.

The whole story makes me angry. I'm sure this is beyond frustrating for you and your siblings. I would want her exposed for what she is and if that means getting close to her, well, so be it. Usually if you give a thief enough rope, they eventually hang themselves. I'm hoping so in your case anyway. Such a sad situation.