So we had Mother's Celebration of Life on Sat. and it went very well... very big crowd, lots of loving comments from friends, very nice statement of Mother's volunteer work at the hospital and then charming, funny comments from the director of Fort Concho where she volunteered for so many years. In fact, for that one day he said the building we were in was to be known as Margie's Commissary since she had chaired the Commissary Building, lo, these many years of Xmas at Old Fort Concho, an amazing record of service. I managed to get through my Daughter's Eulogy without too many tears... and then the wonderful video/slideshow (see it on YouTube.com as "Margie Matheny Through the Years") of my mom from 8 months to her last days. I know I will always treasure that. The violin medley was splendid... so emotional. It all went well.

THEN my step-siblings came here to the house... I thought mostly just to have some food and time together. But good grief! They hit the place like a danged tornado... pulling pictures off the walls, going through drawers, asking me from every direction (and there are LOTS of them so I felt really bombarded!) if they could have this or that. While I was upstairs showing a couple of the step-grandkids (adults) around our little "cave," my DH - thinking he was doing what I wanted, which was to get rid of things yet keep them in the family - let people start taking our own stuff out and packing it in boxes so they could haul off the furniture. WTF!!! When I came down and found all this hoard of locusts ripping up Mother's house, I just LOST IT. Started crying hysterically, trying to make them understand I had JUST that day fully realized my mom was gone and here they were tearing down her "stuff." SO INCREDIBLY DISRESPECTFUL. Of course, I want them all to have pretty much whatever they want but hell - I needed some TIME!!! (They don't live that far away so can get all this stuff later.) Layne and I still have to live here!! I need to take an inventory - partly to see if there are things I want!!! And partly I want to have an antique dealer walk through and give me some values on things... and partly I just want to keep Mother's home intact while I grieve, etc.

They did end up taking their father's dresser - which I had expected. Ann and I had talked about that by phone... so that was OK. But they took LOTS of other stuff. I don't even know WHAT at this point. There were so many people in all the rooms, there was no way I could determine what was going out the door. It was awful. I was still very upset the next day. Of course, once I started crying, they slowed down the rampage... but the damage was done. I really didn't want to even see them on Sunday but thanks to some emotional support from DH and my dear step-sister-in-law, I managed to get through breakfast and the loading of the dresser and then... GOODBYE.

Sorry this is so long... it's been a trying weekend. And now I'm sadly mourning the loss of my beloved mom... can't get out of my head those last sad days...