It's been a while since I posted here. During that time most of the problems I was experiencing with my father ended--no more arguments. It's been great. I'm so happy that what I did worked. We're getting alone fine now. This doesn't mean my life with him are over. Instead, a new set of issues have come about. He's holding on to a house that he's way underwater on. The house is worth 97,000 and he ows over 200,000 on it. This from years of refinancing in spite of me telling him that refis were not a good idea. But he wouldn't listen to me or my mother. Now, over 15 years later he's still not listening. He plows on making mistake after mistake, never researching his decisions and refusing to listen to me or the experts. He's always been a know-it-all, but now he's paying and trying to get me to pay too. He's spends all his time trying to figure out ways to get me to give him my retirement money so he can sink it into the house. He calls and tell me he is going without food and medication. I'm not a rich woman. I'm a commission sales person who has a very small nest-age that is not likely to last through my senior years. I have no children and just purchased a small house. He makes over 4000 a month from his pensions. I make less than 2000 a month on a good month, and yet he wants me to give him money. He feeds the dog steak, refusing to give him dog food most of the time. He's 83 years old and in better health than me. My life has become a living hell just worrying over him.

I'm at my wits end, filled with thoughts of him going without food. Most of the time I hope to die, just so I can get out of this hell hole called earth. I'm not suicidal, just tired of the rat race and know there is a better place with our Lord and Savior.

My job is about to go out of buisiness and I suffered a mini-stroke less than two months ago. I'm just tired. And needed to vent.