Hi Everyone! I'm the sole caregiver for my mom and s-dad. I've been on disability for severe chronic pain conditions for the past 7 years. I live w/ my elderly mom and s-dad. I have no privacy. I have a curfew!!! I'm 51 and have to be in the house by 10pm so the dog doesn't wake the parents. My pain is getting so much worse and I can't get medical help. I'm get SSDI and am just a tiny bit over the Fed. Poverty Guidelines to get Any Assistance at all. I need to get a place of my own! My mom's health is really getting bad. I'd feel so guilty if I did leave, if I could. I have no savings left. No money to get out. I'm expected to do all of the housecleaning, laundry, etc... I have mono at present and my labs (WBC's and thyroid) are a mess. The 1 dr. I do have has decided not to do any more labs, even though my chol and trigs are sky high. I've hit bottom with depression and sleep as much as possible to escape. My mom doesn't seem to care that I'm exhausted. I have no one at all that really cares about me and that makes me so sad. I have a dog and cat who are my world! My mom can hardly walk anymore and doesn't bother to get dressed. She sits at the kitchen table all day and smokes and drinks Diet Coke (even though she has CHF...) My s-dad sleeps all day on the couch. They have NO hobbies. NO friends. I have NO help taking care of them. They refuse any outside help!!! I feel awful physically and emotionally. I pray to die. I won't do anything stupid! I'm just so tired and feel that my life is over. The pain is neverending! I need help so bad and have called all of the agencies that could help, but my mom refuses the help. I feel ready to fall over. I need all of you here! I need time to take care of myself and there is none. I've given up. I hate that I'm missing out on these years where I 'could' still have some sort of a life. But I can't b/c I'm trapped!!!