Caring For Aging Parents Support Group
Caring for aging parents can be a difficul time as we become the caretakers for our parents. This broad responsibility can encompass such services as assisted living, adult day care, long term care, nursing homes, hospice care, and in-home care. Whether you have just started caring for your parents or just need a place to talk, we're here.
I have a delima and I need to hear other people's thoughts. My nephew is getting married in October and he lives in another state. At first I felt like my mom should go, to see a grandchild get married. It's her first grandchild to marry. My brother is of absolutely no help to me, so I know I won't get Much support or really none from him. I just know I can't do all this alone. I can't do the airport all by myself, which my daughter said she'd help if she can get off work. My daughter feels acts like I have to take her, I'm obligated to because it's family. My aunt, my moms sister thinks I'm crazy for even thinking of doing it, and thinks if I do it, it will make my mom go down hill even faster. My mom has dementia and I basically run her life. I live with her except for three times a week, I got 8 hours off each of the three days. I just don't really know what to you, and would appreciate and thoughts, or advice.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
What you might like to consider tho, is get a professional opinion from her very own Dr who knows her, he would be the best person to advise you.
If it would be a day trip, then it may be doable, but assume that you will be 100% involved with your mother and not have much time for other things.
Do you have a cell phone or video camera you can use to record things? You might be able to get the bride and groom to do a nice "Hello Grandma!" greeting at the reception. A few minutes of recording may satisfy your mom, and make her feel like she was there. (I'm not saying to lie to her and try to convince her she was there, be honest and let her know that she is watching video you took while there.)
I am so very sorry that your brother is not part of your mother's life. My sister died before my parents health declined, and I really wish that she had been there to help. On behalf of all of us here who have dealt with parent's health issues w/o help from siblings, I feel your frustration.
Gentle hugs
I appreciate your advice. Yes it's in another state, so iwe would have to be gone for several days. We would have to fly, and rent a car and get a hotel room. The thing is, if I'm not taking her, I'm not planning on going at all. My family is not close, well my brother, and I'm not close with his kids, and I really wouldn't have anyone to leave my mom with. She has the ability to have people think she's doing good, when they don't see her often ,but then I get the craziness when we are alone. Im thinking of writing a letter to my brother, explaining everything and see what he thinks.
Thanks for your response. I really don't have anyone to leave my mom with, and also if I'm not taking her, then I won't be going. I'm not close to my nephew, and it would be expensive to go. I'm just not interested. The wedding isn't until October, but I just feel like I need to start planning and figuring out what to do.
My mum perks up when pple visit, so yes i get that to them they dont see the full extent of what it is like living with them on a daily basis. My brothers havent got a clue, my sister does but at least she gets to leave and go home lol
One person's experience ...https://alzheimersshow.co.uk/editorial/2015/12/04/should-you-take-a-person-with-dementia-on-holiday/