Caregivers Support Group

A voluntary caregiver is a spouse, relative, friend or neighbor of a disabled person or child who assists with activities of daily living and assists those unable to fully take care of themselves. The challenges of a caregiver are unique and sometimes it's hard to find people to talk to who know what you're going through. Join the conversation and find others who...

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mouse30 06/21/2015

Hi - I am new here, hope it is ok to post.
We lost my dad a year ago in May and in February my mom had a stroke and currently cannot drive. I am driving her to and from appointments, trying to sell her house and move her to a smaller place
I am starting to feel resentment towards my sister and everyone. I feel like she is starting to control what i do, and having to adjust my schedule to her needs.
I will always do what she needs to do, but i am tired of starting to put my life on hold.
I am feeling guilty, angry and resement.
I had so many plans and things i wanted to do this summer, yet due to things wont be able to do them and its starting to make me mad.
Maybe i am wrong with all these feelings an i should just suck it up and do more.
i am sorry for venting and i am sorry if i should not be here.
thanks for listening!

Phoebesfriend 06/21/2015

Hi mouse30 ! Welcome ! You're in exactly the right place here to vent. That's what this group is for :-)
Sounds like you have gone thru a lot with losing your dad and now becoming a caregiver. Don't be so hard on yourself, everything you are feeling is perfectly normal, you might say it comes with the territory of being a caregiver.
We're all pretty much in the same boat here. Keep coming back and I'm sure you'll get some great advice from everyone !

Hugs, Phoebe

mouse30 06/21/2015

Hi Phoebe - thank you for your reply. And saying the feelings are normal. I feel like I'm losing my mind and going crazy. Thank you , hugs

KiddoGal 06/21/2015

Venting is fine....we all do it here from time to time. Caregiving is a demanding job, and yes, your life will get put on hold. One thing that might help relieve some of the stress is to get your sister involved in helping you with your mom. Start now - or else your sister will just shove it all on you. And that is not fair. Welcome to our group!

mouse30 06/23/2015

Thanks for the reply ad welcome KiddoGal

HCARD 06/23/2015

Oh mouse so hard, so hard. We all have been angry at the loss of our lives to care for others. You love them but miss your life. Some are also not so lovable. I vent to myself and here often. We are being taken advantage of, at time, losing our dreams, exhausted etc. it is a choice, there is always someone else or a agency that will do the care taking, but we choose to do this. I want out everyday, but continue I don't know why sometimes. Big hug, we get it, come here vent, whine etc. we care.

elisheva14 06/27/2015

I was the one to Care for my Father and Mother and now my husband. Many people are stuck doing it. No one really wants the responsibility. I tried to involve others but no one was willing to help. Sometimes I just don't want to even think about it. I put so much energy into trying to help my husband. I have neighbors in the same situation.

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