Your husband is likely stuck in the shame and guilt and maybe even anger and relief of the impending divorce. It is a failure of the marriage and he likely feels some grief. Not every one process their feelings quickly. Whether long time coming or not. People are human and have feelings, sometimes very complicated feelings.

Your husband gets to tell his family on his own terms. Maybe they are not supportive or nice to him. Maybe he worries they will criticize him.

Let it go. Let your husband do his own thing. He handles this in his own way, you handle it in your own way.

I would not make a huge effort to tell his family, that is husband's job but if the time comes and it comes up in conversation, then it is okay to tell them. No more secrets. But to broadcast it for him is not our place and can be boundary busting.

Thank you so much for your response. ❤️ This was my first time ever using this platform to reach out for help so I thank you for your kind and understanding words of advise.

Welcome! And stay with us. We are glad to meet you. DS is sometimes slow but this forum will eventually get more responses.

Hi Sarah, Welcome to the board.

I agree with @hasty_05 above. He is probably not as close to his family as you are to yours. And like @hasty said, there usually is shame and possibly guilt on his end.

He will tell his family in his own time.

Not really your concern anymore. He'll do what he wants now. And so will you.

More importantly, how are YOU doing with the divorce?

Great that you have your family's support. Do you have friends you can talk to/go out with, co-workers to socialize with... etc. Keep yourself busy and keep being social! It will help you to feel better,

You're going to be fine!

first please allow me to offer my condolences. We never get married expecting or hoping that it will end. Divorce is often like grieving a death, even if it is a relief there is still alot of grief because, the hopes we had, and the joy we shared, along with whatever else, there is loss.

Some men, prefer not to spread their business. Some men are too egotistical to admit they are failing at anything. Some men, wouldnt tell their family if they are on fire, because their family is more likely to toss gas on them and fan the flames rather than water to put them out. (personal experience)

Please keep seeking the support you need and try to wrap your mind around this, divorce means you dont have to wonder or guess why he is doing what he is doing. It isnt your business or concern anymore. Tend to your own needs, its about time your needs were met isnt it? Take care of yourself.

Today is a rough day for me emotionally. I drove 10 hours yesterday to be near my family for a week. Today I am having severe panic attacks and bouts of worrying and guilt. My husband came back to the house to watch our pets while I am gone but all I can do is think about them and worry. I thought getting away for a week would be a good thing, I moved most of my stuff with me. Today I looked at rental house and the neighborhood I would be moving to and it all started overwhelming me to the point of a panic attack. I’m only on week 2 of this separation and I feel so lost, confused and scared. I wish I had more female friends to talk to. I feel like I’m just ranting on here right now but it’s my only outlet. Thanks for letting me vent.

Both adults handling a divorce differently and that is just what I’ve read from your post. Everyone is entitled to choose how to handle difficult situations. Best to you in your divorce. Looks like you’ve made up your own mind.

My prayers and thoughts are with you Sarah. My husband asked for a divorce after I had labored with him for over a year with his cancer journey in 2019/2020. His greedy family and first wife pressured him to "get rid" of me. Very sad, before I signed the papers I hugged him and said the people promoting our divorce will not care for him like I did. He responded, "I know." And with his response, I moved onward with my life. He died about 9 months after our divorce was finalized. Always follow your heart and take care of you above all else

Hey Sarah! I’m new here too. I can relate to a lot of what you’re going through. Wtg in putting yourself & your needs first!! I think a lot of times we don’t for a variety of reasons.
Therapy can also do amazing things- like take your power back. And give you great advice/sayings like “another my problem” which believe me I’ve had to tell myself over & over.
Keep sharing. You got this!!!