Wendy, I know exactly how you feel. 6 years ago I was in your spot. I promise you it does get better.

I don't know your story or if your husband was having an affair. But if he Is, he is living in a fog. This prevents him from feeling the pain that you're feeling. Eventually the roles will reverse. He will realize what he has done, and want you back. By this time you have realized who he really is, and want nothing to do with him.

Stay strong and know that we're here for you. We know your pain.

Unfortunately what your feeling is normal. I went through it and it only got worse as long as I continued contact, with my now ex husband. It was like being rejected and abandoned over and over again until I went no contact. It was still devastating for a few months but it did get better as long as I stayed away from him. It will get easier

" I get this horrible feeling when I have the lights off or close a door, I feel so weird like trapped, I just want to open the door and be outside" I am the same way. Day and night, it feels like there is a big weight that's been tied up in my chest. It's been hard to breathe and just like you I feel trap and I feel like I am being suffocated. Talking to someone helps me. It lifts my mood and relaxes me but then it hits me again after some time. I just started taking magnesium supplements, with its benefits for calming and for getting a good sleep. I know it is very difficult and the pain is brutal. I realized, I need to be gentle with myself, I have suffered so much already. While I am still emotionally lost, I try to focus on what I can do which at this time is taking care of my physical health. It's not easy but I have to, I have to help myself that way, nobody else can do that for me.. You are aware of what is going on with your body and how the stress is affecting you, you know that you need a good rest so you are taking a sleeping pill...start from taking care of your physical health no matter how broken you are emotionally. This will all pass. This will all pass. I keep that as my mantra even though I am still struggling to believe the very sense of it. Hugs.

The anxiety and panic attacks can be debilitating. I missed work and had to be on antianxiety meds for awhile. Don't hesitate to go see your Dr if the panic attacks start interfering with your ability to work or take to care of yourself. Im sorry you're going through this. Sending prayers for strength.

Everything you are feeling is perfectly normal. Don't worry about whether he cares or not. Worry about getting yourself and your life together. I was like that too. I put the focus on him and in my case the other woman. It does nothing good for you.

It's okay to cry and feel sad. Just don't let it take over your day. Allow yourself sometime to cry and then move on. This is adivse I got from coming on this site when I was grieving.

Things will get better for you. You must believe in that. You may not see it now and that's ok. Take one day at a time.

Love yourself because you are worth being loved!!!

Thank you all, I have been in a fog myself, he didn't had an affair, well not that I know of, he is just a plain asshole (sorry can't help it)
I usually know what to do Im the best at giving advice but lately I can't think, I've been isolating myself because I don't want anybody to see me, my eyes are swollen and my mood not so good.
I fake smile because of mt children.
But wow I don't undertsand how something like a separation can hurt so freaking much.
Is ridicoulus.
But thank you all.
Im here if anybody wants to talk

Your pain is indicative of the fact that you love him. His lack of pain indicates to me that it was his decision to end things and, it was? If so then it means he fell out of love with you some time ago. As others have said here your pain is normal and will subside over time, time is your friend, your very best in fact.

Generally that type do not go it alone especially if he
was Already Checked out from you and the marriage.

They Will generally find someone new before leaving.
My ex had no remorse or concern, he had guilt and Shame
that did not stop him. I went total no contact After the
divorce and i moved out of town.

Www,divorcecare.org and therapy will help a lot and to
Just be Around others during the grief and also to get
help, guidance and Support thru out the divorce. HUGS