I've been broken up with my ex for almost three months now. Hardest thing I've ever been through. I recently found out in the last week that she cheated on me and has someone new. I haven't talked to her since a week after she broke up with me. It didn't make sense. She blamed me and an argument we had for the break up. I was blindsided and blamed myself. I knew she probably was talking to someone else and not telling me. But I never accused her. Now I know and it's hurt and grieve all over again. For me nothing allieves all of those emotions , I just ride it out and let myself grieve. Some days are better than others. It helps to have a great support system in friends and family and if you can see a counselor too. I never want to see or hear from her again. She was done the day she broke up with me. I know now that she was probably just looking for a reason. But I was in love with her. And it's hard. One day at a time , feel your feelings, stay no contact, know that when you are at you're worst you will get through it, you'll get stronger, and learn a lot from this. Hang in there, as I tell myself often

She was cheating on you, she hid it, she got into an argument with you to make a reason to breakup with you, to use you, to blame you

She sounds like a great woman

You should get tested for STDs,


Hmmm maybe she is not so great after all

Thanks for confirming what I just said, that was so helpful..

Definitely recommend counseling! Doing things with friends (exercise, movie night) I have been separated for about the same time as u. I still have those bad days and what sucks is I am being the bigger person he still calls to talk to our kids and comes to see them...which I am grateful for but at the same time it is way harder to let go and heal. I think with time it will get easier but in meantime seek out help...u are not alone

Knowing how amazing I am as a partner, as a friend and as a confidant, keeps me going. I tell myself that's it's her loss she left not mine. I just focus on making myself better for the next person that comes along.

My ex-wife and I finalized our divorce in March and in NC since early May. I'm in the same boat as you and doing exactly what your doing plus maybe more - therapy and support group. Lately, I felt hopeless because I continue want, wish, and miss my ex-wife. Despite all of my effort Im still grieving, feeling guilty and having anxiety attacks. i hated these high and low emotions especially the anxiety attacks.

I was told that I haven't really fully accepted my situation - that the relationship is over and I may continue love her but need to accept that we're not meant to be together (not right now or maybe not ever) due to many factors why the relationship ended.

I hope you already accepted your situation. If not, maybe try counseling/therapy and support groups should help.

For anxiety, I tried Tai Chi, mediation and coloring. It might not be your thing, but try to find something that helps you calm down while diverting your thoughts into something else.

Divorce is difficult and painful. It's been 17 years since mine. Today, I'm remarried to a wonderful and loving man for almost 12 years and we have a son together and my wasband and I have reconciled and became friends. There is light at the end of the tunnel. The only way to heal is to forgive one another and don't hold anything from the past against each other. I know it may sound crazy and risky but it works. Faith is what got me through the pain and conflict with my co-parent. I wouldn't be who I am today without it.

A great resource for a divorce support group is DivorceCare.org. They are located throughout different cities. They really do help people. Blessings to you and your family. I will keep you in my prayers.