Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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pinkrose28 10/02/2015

After doing well and not seeing or speaking to my ex for a long time I feel I fell of the wagon. I was dealing with extreme pain from a very difficult situation degrading my family and I did the only thing I knew how to do. I reached out to my ex for comfort. I wanted to feel numb from life and numb from the severe pain I was feeling. I allowed myself to fall right back into those same deep feelings and emotions.

I am now in a situation where I cant stop thinking about him and cant stop wanting him back. Nothing is making this pain go away, I am in therapy I am trying to talk to friends but all I think about is wishing I had back what I did despite knowing how that turned out. I feel literally obsessed to the point it is effecting my overall health. I have struggled with ocd for 10 years so relationships have always been hard for me but the level of attachment I am feeling for him is nothing I have felt before. I truly am in so much pain that I no longer no what to do with myself

pinkrose28 10/02/2015

I meant regarding my family NOT degrading

murphytoronto 10/02/2015

You have back slid
It is ok and part of your grieving process
I know it hurts so much....but you have to focus on the bad things he has done to you and try to go no contact again

He is not the man that you loved before

You have suffered so much hurt

Try to focus on an alternative future that is different

Give yourself time to get there.....It does not include him

kenjb47 10/02/2015

I had the feeling an elephant was standing on my chest for weeks after my split, could not think and felt out of breath, lost. Several weeks later it still sucks,but it has gotten better. It takes time to heal a broken heart and there is no time table for it to happen. It helps to think of the bad things they have done to knock them off the pedestal our minds have put them on and it becomes too easy to start blaming ourselves for what others have done. Keep as busy as possible and don't let anyone transfer guilt that does not belong to you. Good luck, you are not alone in this struggle.

louiemir 10/02/2015

I have been divorced for over 15 years and have felt very lonely for many years. Been on way too many relationship rollercoasters to even keep count. Every relationship that ends takes a little more out of your heart and soul. Even as a man, I relate to your feelings of sadness and desperation. At this point I do not know what the answer is anymore.

heartofgold4always 10/02/2015

It fucking blows and it hurts so bad. Don't beat yourself up for reaching out. You had a weak moment and that is ok. It does help to think of the whole picture when you are obsessing about him. Remember the reasons you are not with him and the pain you felt being in the relationship. The awful pain you feel now will lessen in time and you will make room for something wonderful. If you stayed with him the pain you felt (concentrate on that Pain) when you were with him would continue and probably get worse and that isn't the life you want. But believe me I know it is real bad going through this break up. You are not alone

pinkrose28 10/03/2015

thank you everyone I realize I did slip back and made a mistake with him but I cant change that all I can do it move forward and begin to heal again I hope I can get to a better place again

lovelylonelylady 10/04/2015

My boyfriend left because and didnt really tell me why, he got in another relationship within a week. That really hurted and i cant let it go. I try to focus on myslef and the future but I know It wont be with him and thats what keeps me up at night. I just dont know what to do with all the pain, how do i fix it and let it go. How can I get closure and release this anger from my soul!

vervane 10/05/2015

I understand OCD, my sister has it and I have a touch of it. I know how incredibly hard breakups with it are. With me, whatever little bit of OCD I have comes roaring out during a breakup. I just can't escape thoughts of my ex. Everything reminds me of him, everything.....little objects bring back memories of something he said or somewhere we went or something we did together, and it's awful. Like torture. Like a burden on your mind and spirit...I feel physically ill at times. No apetite, and stressed all day long from the moment I wake up. I understand you pain, you are not alone.

For me the pain lessened slowly over time, but nothing truly made me fell 100% better until I moved on to someone new. I know that may not be the best solution for you yet... here are a few other suggestions. Consider planning a trip to look forward to, write down your feelings, take a course, schedule visits with a counsellor.

heartofgold4always 10/05/2015

Plan something nice for yourself to look forward to everyday. I am in the middle of this unbearable pain also. I want to move on but don't quite know how to do that and know I can't until I grieve the huge loss. Reading "getting past your break up" helped me a lot. Take care of yourself even in small ways and you will eventually get to a better place. I wish I could say when but I can't. Do the work to Improve you in the meantime.

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