I know that some day I am going to cringe when someone asks me, so what happened? I am not looking forward to explaining the whole sad thing every time I go on a date with someone. Its not fun to have to bring up the past every time you try and move forward. I agree the D word is a nasty one.

Maybe because I am older... but I have actually run into more people who are divorced and how single again or divorced and now remarried... I had no idea that so many people were divorced.... it's like a club..... and the people in my dating circle are all divorced... so I haven't had this experience yet.... however- what I find truly sucks is going someplace where there are families everywhere and I am the "single mom"... now that makes me feel like a big loser....

I know exactly how you feel. Even as a woman who's been divorced it seems as though you bring that up and people look at you like your crazy. I am only 33 so that makes it worse, when people ask it's almost like they can't believe I didn't at least try or that I am somehow at fault, or gee maybe there's a reason you're alone. Things don't work, it happens, and I agree, it makes things a lot more complicated. Best hope is to find someone who's gone through it and understands your situation without being judgemental...I do believe those people are out there...Somewhere perhaps? I'm sorry for your trouble.

I'm sorry but I view this differently. People who ask such rude questions should not be tolerated. Asking what you did wrong is very rude, it is also assumptive. The asker is assuming you did something wrong.

A great many of us who are divorced did nothing wrong, our spouses cheated on us, were drunks, addicts, etc.. Anyone who assumes you did something wrong is not someone you need to think about a 2nd date with.

Those kind of people are always looking to "lay blame". To me it says they are the type who will always be looking for a "scape goat"...let them look elsewhere. That's nearly as rude as asking a widow/widower "so did you kill him/her"?

I'm hypnotized by that licking avatar.

I know that I am viewed differently by people because they know I am 31 and divorced. Being the male, some people even go so far as to ask me if I cheated on my ex. WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!??!

I think that it is a hurdle too when you meet someone you are interested in. They hear that you are divorced and they seem to loose interest quickly.

I agree with Courier, that it IS kind of a rude assumption to make and I also agree with Vacuume, the licking icon is pretty facinating isn't it? LOL And to those who ask you if you cheated...SHAME ON THEM and their ignorance....that's all that is. Sheer ignorance. People never cease to amaze me sometimes!!!

I thought that at first but those who really care about me pretty much know or don't care, they know that I was devoted and tried to save my marriage.

I too am finding that a lot of people my age and even a bit younger are going through divorce as well. I had a cousin whose just went final in April and have three friends my age or just older who are all currently going through their own divorces.

Personally, if someone asks me or doesn't ask, then is judgemental when they find out, I don't really care if they like me or not. I'd prefer to be with someone who either listens and accepts it or doesn't even care but likes me for who I am.

I wouldn't want to be with someone who can't accept the fact everyone has a past, and the older you get the more filled it is. I always tell people you can't change the past, and if they can't accept that my past is part of me, and who I am regardless of whether it was good or bad, then they aren't worth the time or engery. Everyone has things in their past, no matter who they are and people who are worth a damn won't judge you for that. It's part of life for pete's sake. I agree with you, either you don't care or you like me for me...what's done is done and if you expect me to go backwards to justfiy it then pound sand..LOL

I agree with you. There can be a stigma about divorce. I am dreading dating even though I am nowhere near there yet. Married friends sometimes behave differently as if I may try to snatch their man away and I have witnessed seemingly happily married men start dropping hints and showing a little too much interest in me. It's in the verbage, especially when they start whining about their wives. Also, I run into the self-righteous that say things like "Oh, well, we don't believe in divorce..when we married we married for life.." or "When I get married, it is going to be forever." Like I didn't think that too! For all, I have wonderful comebacks, but try to remain as pleasant as possible for my own satisfaction.

I'm divorced, not damaged, and if people can't see that, they can kiss my hairy white ass

word

LMAO! There ya go!!

I enjoy being single. Does that make me bad? ;) When people ask me if I'm ever going to be married and I effectively whoop for joy jump up and down and do a little victory dance while screaming "HELL NO!" they assume I'm a commitment phobe. I like men. I just don't want to keep them.

I got over the shame of it. Cuz really if u r my age and not been married by now, you got ISSUES!
I am still yet to meet a guy over 30 still single that is not a social moron. Prove me wrong life!!
Even though being divorced sucks, it is not so bad. it shows commitment ability and that you had a real relationship once before, not a string of stupid bs most guys I meet have.
I would prefer to meet a divorced guy getting over a bad x. I bet he can appreciate a nice person a lot more.

I asked my shrink what to say to guys that ask me, so you got so much going for you how come u r single.
Answer is; I married an idiot.

I think if you hit a certain age and are single, and not divorced, something is wrong with you.

Baggage is attractive, especially if is Louis Vuitton