Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
First of all I want to thank everyone here. I feel badly I have not posted on anyones postings, but I am still figuring things out and am still not sure when things will get better for me (how can I tell some one else it will?). I do read the posts and my heart and happy thoughts go out to everyone here. I truly wish no one else was going through this.
Its been a hard few months. I am back to living on my own in the not so nice part of town (all I could afford). I was doing ok for a few weeks but then I dont know what happened. for the past two weeks I can not stop feeling sad. I cry at my desk (which is not good because I just got promoted), I cry when i drive, I cry when I walk past the food he used to like. He was my first true love and my best friend.
When he called me to break up (yes he called after 5 years of being together) he said he wanted to be friends. He keeps saying he wants to be friends. Every once in a while he texts to see if I'm ok. I know that if we WERE to be able to be friends (i want to but I dont know if I can), one day he will meet some one that will not allow it. I told him this would happen. He swore it wouldnt because "I saved his life" (got him clean off drugs and back on his feet).
And then he called to say he has a new GF. I spent the last few days curled in a ball after work on my couch and stayed there. And that the new GF does not want him to contact me. He aparently told her that this is not possible, but he will cut down contact with me (so it starts!!). He wants to go out for lunch with me when he comes to town but the GF told him no. He said he still wants to go for lunch.
I guess my advice is should I just tell him i dont think we should have any contact? It pains me to not speak to him anymore. I KNOW that no matter who he ends up with they wont want him talking or seeing me. I know its going to come so should I just not go though this heart ache again?? I know that if I see him I wont get what I want out of it. He wont hold me, make me feel special, and wont want to be with me even though he says he still loves me (just not in that way). I so so want to see him.
Can anyone give me some advice please??
Thanks
Its been a hard few months. I am back to living on my own in the not so nice part of town (all I could afford). I was doing ok for a few weeks but then I dont know what happened. for the past two weeks I can not stop feeling sad. I cry at my desk (which is not good because I just got promoted), I cry when i drive, I cry when I walk past the food he used to like. He was my first true love and my best friend.
When he called me to break up (yes he called after 5 years of being together) he said he wanted to be friends. He keeps saying he wants to be friends. Every once in a while he texts to see if I'm ok. I know that if we WERE to be able to be friends (i want to but I dont know if I can), one day he will meet some one that will not allow it. I told him this would happen. He swore it wouldnt because "I saved his life" (got him clean off drugs and back on his feet).
And then he called to say he has a new GF. I spent the last few days curled in a ball after work on my couch and stayed there. And that the new GF does not want him to contact me. He aparently told her that this is not possible, but he will cut down contact with me (so it starts!!). He wants to go out for lunch with me when he comes to town but the GF told him no. He said he still wants to go for lunch.
I guess my advice is should I just tell him i dont think we should have any contact? It pains me to not speak to him anymore. I KNOW that no matter who he ends up with they wont want him talking or seeing me. I know its going to come so should I just not go though this heart ache again?? I know that if I see him I wont get what I want out of it. He wont hold me, make me feel special, and wont want to be with me even though he says he still loves me (just not in that way). I so so want to see him.
Can anyone give me some advice please??
Thanks
As for your EX...i think you already answered your question. You cant heal if you keep contact.( although, im learning this also as i move on....) Set it free if comes back to you it was meant to be.
Much hugs!
Initiate the no contact rule. This guy is not good for you. Remember....HE broke up with you. Move on. As hard as it is, after 5 years he just walks away that non-chalantly....he doesn't deserve any more of your time.