I don't know all your circumstances but, I would try counseling before divorcing, if at all possible. Him dating a girl at work does not seem like a very stable marriage so, there must be some other issues you did not mention. Please understand, I am not being judgmental at all. You going to a dating site, in my opinion is indeed dangerous. These guys can be anything for a while. If you can salvage the marriage would be the best but, that's just my opinion. If there is no love there anymore, then, a divorce may be the option you choose.

Well my first thoughts is dont worry about dating for awhile. I was married for 13 years and with her for 18. She was mentally ill and the abuse she put upon our family grew year after year. I had to get me and my boys away from it. You need to take time and think about your own happyness and that of your children. Let that guide you heart and decisions. If you think the marriage can be salvaged then try therapy and see if it will help. Also remember wasting the only life you have on beating a dead horse isnt going to be pleasant. I wish you luck !

It took me 2 years to get over my divorce and I wished my husband would come to his senses. If your husband is genuine see a qualified therapist and see if you can work it out. I went to a Christian therapist and he was helpful but my ex was depressed and started drinking. No hope for us once he was out of control. God be with you.

Thank you so much for your replies!
There is a lot of damage from a situation that happened 10 years ago...I don't want to get into it but it was something no mother should have to worry about concerning a dad doing something inappropriate to his daughter. It has mentally messed me up. And yes I tried to leave him called cps and they cps did nothing....so for me there is no love in marriage...I am not even attracted to him. Thus is why I felt like when I heard him dating a girl from his office I went online. I feel stuck because I can't seem to find the strength to leave...I don't want to be alone and I have a child with a disease.

I know how frightening it can be. When I got married it was right from home, in with my husband for 24 years, having never gone it by myself.

I'm very fortunate to have now found a place I can afford on my own to sort myself out and heal because it's what I needed.

I can tell you right now that any relationship you enter because you can't be alone and are just looking for someone to fill the void is not going to be healthy and be like going from the frying pan into the fire. That is not the answer to your problems.

It seems you have a decision to make. Take charge of your life and proceed with your divorce, or put up with misery and disrespect.

I know it might seem impossible with your daughter's CF, but you can find a way to survive without your H, although you might not feel that way at present. That incident 10 years ago? Let that spur you forward, so that you can carve out a healthy life for you and your children. We become so damaged when we stay willingly in a unhealthy relationship, and I think we owe it to ourselves and our children to make change for the better. Your daughters are at risk of modeling your behavior with BFs or Hs down the road. Show them that a woman in dire circumstances can overcome it. Take small steps to getting employment (if you're not working) or improving your education or credentials. 10 years miserable in a marriage is 10 years too many. Been there, done that, on my way out and feeling better every single day.

Jojored...soooo true! I want to be a strong independent role model.. this divorce has been lingering for 2 years. ..I am really trying to get strength...I have a life coach helping me....I have a business that could be very successful...I have everything good going forward but self confidence!

As women I think we get so caught up with defining ourselves through others. Its something ingrained and then when that definition is compromised somehow we dont know what to do. I know for myself when my first husband and I separated and divorced I was completely lost and went in a downward spiral. Not till I realized that I didnt have a choice but to regain who I was and a new definition of myself did I start to get better and feel good about myself. I hope you find a way to get out of this marriage and soon. He is holding you and your children back from the life you deserve.

When the time is right u wont hesitate. When I divorced in 2010 my two boys were 6 n 7 n now myself n them are doing well. God has great plans for u to succeed. HUGS