I’d say he expects some form of separation has and is happening. Somebody needs to get together for even an understanding of what has happened. It’s either you or him to play that first card here but you can only paint half the picture without his input. Keep trying and blessings for a peaceful understanding and healing.

you and your partner should think about all the good memories you both shared together in the past and that initial feelings both of you had for another and that shared vision/goal when you guys were considering marriage. Not communicating in long term will only makes things worse and its going to get harder to resolve the issue. If he is avoiding communication, try softening him up by focusing on his needs and wants (what he likes, food, certain place etc...) to show that you care about him and wants to makes things work. I don't know how long it will take for him to soften up (if ever unless he already made up his mind and determined to leave this relationship for good) but you should at least try until you have no regrets at the end.
In long term, if any relationship were to last, both needs to work together and share the same goal and desire of wanting to make the relationship work. Try to revive that old initial feelings you both had for one another and remind each one of you why you loved one another and decided to tie the knot in the first place. walk down that memory lane and see where it started to get wrong and openly talk about it, admit any wrongs done and express intention to make the right change with help from another.

Thanks for the thoughts. Just really struggling right now.. I am completely willing to work on changes. I have resolved for myself to put away some long standing resentments that I have had. I’m not sure he is in a place to be willing to do that. Each time I try and approach even the tiniest snippet of problems I am met with almost complete unwillingness. Right now communication (that was already lacking to begin with) is so strained. I think there have been many wrongs between us that have been building and I am in no way placing all the blame on him. I want so desperately to talk but when I am feeling as though I am shut down as soon as I even try, it’ seems to widen the already gaping hole that is there right now.

I will appreciate any prayers. I am a person of faith but not the strongest in my convictions. I am appreciative of any thoughtful prayer that I am able to get right now.

Have you tried marriage counseling? Have you asked him if he would like to try that? I do not want to be a downer but doing the laundry but leaving just yours in a pile, making snide comments and acting like what you say in unimportant, and your possibly correct feelings that he's being cruel to you on purpose, I'm familiar with these tactics in my own marriage and it has gotten waaaay worse. Please listen to your gut and keep your eyes open. I'm not sure that catering to him will make the problems better but worse. Like giving him permission to treat you this way. Best luck to you. Please let us know how it goes.

Thank you. I have asked if he will go and work through some things. And he has said he will not. I have made an appointment for myself. I’m trying to be patient. Give him some space. Let him sort out what he is thinking and feeling. Whether it’s good or bad.