Yeah. She is just not happy with anything. You're right. She has convinced herself that she is unhappy because she brings up things that happened years ago....almost 9 years ago........never realized it but her Mom acts the same way about things. Pretty scary when I realized it that she is probably just acting like her Mom does. Her Mom left her Dad when she was 2 as well....the similarities are striking......oh and lets add another twist into this. We both work at the same place for our full time job.

Well you can't continue with the should of, would of. You did all those things because you love'd, and wanted to take care of her. Now your faced with a new reality and have some tough decisions to make.

Yup that is the realization that I came to yesterday. Tried to unblind myself from the bs that she is still pulling. You're right. I did these things because I loved her which is why it hurts......but it is getting better.

Look when my wife of 24 years bailed out she told me she didn't thing I ever got over my girlfriend I had before we met...25 years ago!! They'll say anything to justify in their own head their reason for leaving. All you need to focus on is yourself and your kid now. Whatever she says is just mindless chatter. It's best not to even let them talk to you because emotionally they're in a far different place.

@drewemc I'm hoping the best for you and your daughter then.

I had to take a few days away to myself. Just still trying to make grips with what is actually going on. I have come to the realization that she has convinced herself that she is not happy so she can do her own thing....even though I think she knows that it is not the right decision. Just like you said LeeKay, she is trying to justify what she is doing. It just hurts knowing how much I have sacrificed for my family to watch it all crumble away in front of me. I cannot control what she wants to do I just need to keep doing what I'm doing and things will fall in place from there.....there is a bit of anxiety not knowing when that will happen but I am staying true on the path and will find my way. I cannot ruin a good day today by thinking about a bad day yesterday.....just need to let it go. Yes prplcarn my daughter is picking up on it....out of the blue she asks me if I am sad and if Mommy is being mean to me......not sure where that came from....but she picked it up along the way. I don't want to expose her to anymore drama but things see at a standstill right now.

I really relate to your post. I'm going through something similar, my husband has decided he is done. We have a child together and another on the way. He cheated on me, multiple times. Despite everything, I want to try to work things out for the sake of our family. He is adamant he is done. The feelings I hold are indescribable. He seems to be choosing this new person over trying to clean up his mess. He is devaluing everything we had and only focusing on the negatives, when in reality our relationship was great the majority of the time.

I can't explain how I feel but for some reason I do feel better. We went on our family vacation to Nashville at the end of July. Two days after we got back she moved out and into her parents house without any warning....The trip was so much fun and it felt like old times.....I felt crushed but for some reason I am starting to feel better about it. Every day I get a little bit stronger and keep pushing myself just a little more. As heartbroken I am and as hard it is to explain to my three year old that she can not come home every night I feel OK. My house is still full of all of her things but it doesn't bother me. I need to start working on putting those things together for her but the sense of anxiety that I had everyday when she was at the house is starting to go away. I don't feel great just yet but for some reason I feel better about things than when she was at home still lying to me about what was going on. Keep strong friends! Let me know if anyone needs help or just wants to chat. I'm seeing a therapist by myself and trust me it helps.

So I came across a very interesting article the other day and as much as things still hurt they are starting to make more and more sense to me. https://www.the-generous-husband.com/2016/11/08/dont-let-limerence-destroy-your-marriage/ A very intriguing read and if you have time please read. I have struggled for months trying to make sense of what was happening and I think this broke though to make some sense of the matter for me. She was completely checked out and did not want to work on things and would not ever tell me what was going on. I always felt like I was second to know because he was always first in her mind because it looks like she was in limerence and probably still is. I have never heard of this before but the more and more I think about it a light bulb goes on. I think all of this time I felt like everything was my fault because that is what she lead me to believe and it tore at me every minute of every day......maybe not so much anymore. Give it a read and let me know what you think.